Healthcare fix in one sentence: The Erin Plan:

Give basic coverage to everyone and the peeps who want to buy supplemental insurance can get as fancy as they want.

There. That's how you do it. Obama's plan to start slow with a public insurance option ain't quite right, but it's a step in the right direction. He knows damn well you can't install the Erin Plan all at once.

Basic coverage means pregnancy, immunizations, your cholesterol meds, emergency medicine, etc. Someone else can figure out copays and whether or not you include coronary bypass surgery for someone age 55 but not age 89. Gastric bypass? Seems dodgy to me, but I'm guessing there'll be plenty of insurance peddlers out there ready to shell out any plan you want to cover what the Gov doesn't.

CODE ORANGE NEWS ALERT to all you schmucks worrying about the gummint getting in your face about your health choices. Don't be a dumb-ass. Private insurers practically do an autopsy on you before they'll cover you. We took out a new life insurance policy when our kid was born. That private insurer sent someone to our house to draw our blood for testing.

Read that last sentence again. Go on, read it.

And when my kid fell off her bike and broke her wrist? Our health insurer mailed a form full up with questions about who they could sue to recoup the costs when it was all over.

Ever get a letter from one of your docs saying he won't accept your insurer anymore? Even after you and your employer are paying out the ass for the coverage every month? I have.

People, insurance companies make their profits by NOT paying your medical bills. Yes, Gov. programs such as Medicare are flawed, but you talk to any doc and they'll tell you Medicare is 100 times better than any private insurer. And please DO NOT bring up the toenail thing.

There is one more diseased tumor on America's healthcare behemoth that no one's talking about. Malpractice suits are waaaaaay out of hand. The expensive cover-your-ass mentality that permeates our medical care is a direct product of too many lawyers and too much greed and it's got to stop.

Now then, anyone have any ideas on how to fix that?

bloop

Erin drink beer this afternoon.

Erin has no postie.

Erin say go read comment section in post below if you needie to readie.

In fact, go on and comment yourself. No need to stay on topic.

erf-o!

God's gift to liberals

Cupcakes are health food

Your hostess has concluded of a series of events, the most recent of which was a party she held yesterday in honor of her mom's 70th birthday. Hence she is depleted of her normal vivacity and is lying about her silken couches like an overcooked noodle. Further evidence of her exhaustion is in her eyes, which are two forlorn crosses and her tongue, which is lolling from her mouth.

Miraculously, a plate of mini cupcakes survived yesterday's festivities. Providing your humble authoress can find the strength to rouse herself, she believes the magical cakes (flavored in vanilla chai, mimosa, red velvet and mojito) will fortify her enough to plod through the rest of the day or at least fuel her trip back to the couch. After all, chai is tea and that's loaded with health benefits; mimosa means orange and mojito means lime--that's two serving of fruit. Red velvet means fiber in another language and buttercream frosting is calcium.

If the esteemed reader is interested in procuring some of these healthcakes for him or herself, your hostess recommends a visit to these ladies.

It is at these moments when your humble authoress basks in the rightful title of these pages: The Erin O'Brien Owner's Manual for Human Beings. If this isn't appropriate instruction for living, what is?

Things that scare me about my husband, vol. VI

It's important to note that the BBQ grill is no where near the garage.

* * *

Previously on "Things that scare me about my husband."

* * *

All hail Mother Nature

Can anyone tell me exactly why marijuana is still illegal? I mean, we could really use that tax revenue and (here's a little secret) the people who want to smoke pot are smoking it anyway. I also don't think putting marijuana people (smokers, growers, sellers, etc.) in jail is a good use of my tax dollars.

To all those people who think marijuana is the gateway to crack and heroine and the rest of it? It's not. Don't be dumb. I don't care much for marijuana and I don't use it, but I know enough about it to say that it's not nearly as dangerous as alcohol. People who smoke pot just want to eat nacho cheese Doritos and HoHos. Sometimes they like to screw as well. Who cares?

Maybe now that the U S of A is going broke, people will start thinking outside of the box on this sort of thing. Why lookie here! Seems the good folks of Oakland, CA are already ahead of me on this one.

Miscellaneous list and some SoCal pix

"If you don't put your name and the date on it, it belongs in the garbage." Credit: someone real smart.

I like hummingbirds.

Yesterday's coffee tasted better yesterday.

Our airports are no more secure today than they were on Septemeber 10, 2001.

"Bruno" was a gay "Borat," but not as funny.

When you eschew commitments in life, eventually your life will eschew commitments to you.

Not like I know any of this from personal experience or anything--but when a person is standing on Venice Beach in front of a mannequin waiting for the wind to blow up said mannequin's skirt like it just did when that person first walked by (thereby exposing the oddly pornographic smooth plastic crotch) in order to take a picture, it's all right for the first minute or so, but after that, the person is basically just a weird person pointing their camera at the mannequin's nether parts and the parties associated with that person start to tap their feet, look away, and act as though they are not associated with that person.

Why aren't all the people who are freaking out about a public health insurance option freaking out about Medicare or the health care we provide for our military personnel? Why haven't they been protesting those programs?

I need to clean the house. I need to make the bed. I need to figure out how I'm going to get four cases of beer cold for the party on Sunday. And the toilets? I really need to scrub the toilets.

This post is done.

People who don't think Obama is a US citizen are flaming industrial-strength morons

This is truly worth 11 minutes of your time:

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Phone cam round-up: travel edition

A proper photo essay of Los Angeles is forthcoming. Until then ...


Coffee while waiting to depart at Max & Erma's in Cleveland Hopkins International Airport. Wouldn't sit on that dumb barstool.


Wild snails roaming the streets of Los Angeles.


Terrifying tree trunk.


Black tie strew across a bush.


A ladies' sweater was folded atop a pair of high heels beneath an adjacent bush. I hope they had a good time.


ipods and gadgets for sale in LAX. Who buys an iPod in an airport? Dunno.


Mystifying hand dryer.


A big steer in the Houston Airport.


George H. Bush statue and misc. in the Houston Airport.


Bushi info.


Beetles copulating in my driveway upon my return home.

***

Around Noon

I'll be live with Dee Perry for her "Around Noon" show today, 12 p.m. EST. You can listen live via this link or download the podcast from there after the fact.

Also, the lovely DDP and her dashing gentleman friend recorded my appearance at Book Soup in Los Angeles last Thursday. The footage is 12 minutes and is split into two parts:

Erin at Book Soup on 7/16/09 part 1

Erin at Book Soup on 7/16/09 part 2

Back to regular erinish blogging later this week. erf!

On "Better"

As promised, here is the essay on my brother John's novel Better for the Los Angeles Times: "Clues in John O'Brien's Better."

For any new readers looking for more on John, I offer some of my in-depth writing on my brother and his work and an associated blog entry with additional pictures and links. Thanks for dropping in.

Confidential to the city of Los Angeles: Thank you for being you. You give good visit. Also, many thanks for not quaking the earth beneath yourself during my visit. One last thing--and you're probably not going to like this--but the people in your airport look a whole lot like the people in the Cleveland Airport.

The soup was delicious

Last night's event at Book Soup was truly wonderful. I loved listening to Joseph Mattson's and Jerry Stahl's commentary. I loved the shop and the staff was terrific, as was the audience. Thanks to all who attended!


Jerry, your humble authoress, and Joseph.


My name on a sign that does not include the worrd "wanted."


My and my good bud Bill Lippincott. Check out the books that were on the shelf behind the speaking podium. woot!

And another special thanks to DDP. Our photo got botched somehow, but I was so very happy to finally to meet you.

Notes from atop the San Andreas Fault

I am in Los Angeles. Los Angeles is not Cleveland. No earthquakes yet; but I'll keep you posted.

Here is a an excerpt of Better from today's LA Weekly.

Any So Cal babies out there know where I took today's pic? It's a very famous LA venue.

Steaming hot Book Soup for everyone on Sunset Strip tonight!

I will be on 90.3 WCPN's "Around Noon" show with Dee Perry at 12 p.m. EST on Monday, July 20th. We'll be talking about Better. You can listen to the show live here. If you are interested but can't catch the show live, listen to the podcast. I'll post the link as soon as it's available.

Confidential to readers: I miss my Goat!

Book soup?

This Thursday, I'll be in Los Angeles for an evening in celebration of my brother John and his work, and to launch his last posthumously published novel "Better." The event will be at 7 p.m. at Book Soup on Sunset Boulevard and will also feature Jerry Stahl and Joseph Mattson.

"Better" is a book of many dimensions. The most compelling of which for me is the metaphorical aspect by which John explores his genetic predisposition to his addiction. I have written an essay detailing what's percolating between the lines of "Better" for the Los Angeles Times, which is slated to run on July 19, 2009. If anyone out there can obtain a hard copy of the article for me, I would very much appreciate it. Here's my address:

Erin O'Brien
P. O. Box 470167
Broadview Hts., OH 44147

In the meantime, for those looking for more on John, I offer some of my in-depth writing on my brother and his work and an associated blog entry with additional pictures and links.

Now here's pix of John and me at Universal Studios in June, 1986 taken by John's then-wife Lisa. We all laughed so hard on that trip. It feels like a lifetime ago. I suppose it was.

Cheap Bubbles

All this week, Edward Champion will be posting a round-table discussion about Ellen Ruppel Shell's new book Cheap: The High Cost of Discount Culture. Your humble authoress was a member of the panel. You can read my musings as well as a host of others over at Ed's place. If you've read the book or have comments on the comments, you're welcome to gas on about it here or over in Ed's comment section.

If you don't care about any of that, then watch this film of Ed's that I just love, Bubbles: A Consideration because bubbles are free and as evidenced by this effort, they make people happy:

Al Koran Shriners

The Al Koran Shrine is just a few miles from my house.

Years ago, I did a story about the Shriners for a local paper. They might seem like a strange group from the outside, but the Shriners raise money to fund Children's hospitals that service the very poorest kids with the very toughest problems: severe burns, amputations, etc.

The Shrine itself is quite a place. There's portraits of all the past Imperial Potentates on the walls (the one on the upper left is from 1903), a life-sized stuffed camel in the lobby and a clubby lounge with tons of clown pics the walls. There's fez's all over the place too.

People aren't as drawn to this sort of social/charitable organization as they once were and the Shriners are a fading piece of Americana. But we can love 'em until then, especially those little orange cars that they race around all the local parades.

Here they are at the 2009 July 4 Parade in Chesterland, OH:

Lookie that

Even revered conservative commentator Peggy Noonan thinks Palin is a moron.

Ivory beacon

Hello. This is a picture of my soap.

When my soap gets used up to the point when it is nothing more than a thin slip that no longer supplies suds no matter how vigorously I rub-a-dub-dub it, I do not throw it away. Instead, I get a new bar of soap and, after cleansing and rinsing myself, I get the husky new bar good and sudsy again, but only in order to glue the frail old soap fragment to the top of it.

I carefully rinse the old/new soap-bar conglomerate, making sure the suds between the two entities remain intact in order to adhere them together. Then I put the bar in the recessed soap dish for 24 hours of drying time, which will hopefully permanently fuse the bars together in time for my next shower.

After two or three showers, all evidence that the soap was once two parts is gone. Hence, by this method, not only do I eliminate waste, but soap becomes a pleasant continuum in my life, a constant commodity that waxes and wanes but is never subject to absolute end. Simple procedures such as this relinquish me of sin and render me holy in lieu of traditional religious practices.

That is all.

Saturday on Coventry

At 7 p.m. this Saturday, I'll be at Mac's Backs on Coventry in Cleveland Heights talking about Better, my brother John's last posthumously published novel.

In a foreboding mansion that looms above the glittering lights of Los Angeles, a suave and wealthy host named Double Felix, a hooker named Zipper and narrator William weave their story amid plenty of booze, other housemates, and casual sex. But the story between the lines is all John's.

It only took me 15 years to figure that out, people.

It is absolutely stunning to me that the longer John is gone, the more I continue to learn about him. Better is an odd book, but it's rapidly becoming one of the most important pieces of John's work for me.

So come out to Coventry this Saturday. It's not only the perfect spot to spend a summer evening in Cleveland, you'll also get the inside story on one of this town's most legendary voices.

Before the flame out

In lieu of original content by Yours Truly today, here's an exhaustive article on Alaska's NonGovernor Sarah Palin by Todd Purdum for Vanity Fair. It's a fascinating read all about poor little Sarah's problems notable for many reasons, but in no small part because it was published just before her spectacular flame out.

The great Republican Governor. Yeah, yeah. She couldn't even tough out one term. Christ awmighty, people, I told you she was a silly little broad from the get go.

Warhol's Blow Job

Not the original, which was longer and ran at a different frame rate, but evocative and arousing nonetheless. I don't know if a soundtrack accompanied Warhol's original footage, but I preferred to mute the music on this vid anyway.

I wonder if "Blow Job" was part of the impetus for Beautiful Agony.

A good 4th to all

The best thing about today is that the Statue of Liberty has reopened. Yay!

Clickit

The funniest online photo gallery I've seen in a long time.

Phone cam round-up

Prelude to consensual shadow sex with telephone pole.


Shoes for sale, one dollar. No thanks but can I have some water?


Aw, you aren't really gonna sell Gram's needlepoint cats, are ya?


RIP Mr. FrogToad.


Used all the Aseptic Creamers. Throw out the box and bring another up from the basement. Good thing we no gotta refrigerate these mothers.


Sushi for lunch. Yay!


Visual representation of Gift Bag Rejection Syndrome.


Nobody's Inn Cahoots at 7 a.m.


Buffalo soldier.


Somebody lost eight hearts boo hoo.