Monday, October 30, 2006

Trick or treat bugapalooza with Steve Hayward

I received a press kit from the Bloodview Haunted House a few weeks ago. It came in a cool coffin shaped box. Inside, there were the predictable photos and information packet. There was also candy. But this wasn't your KitKats and Snickers and Reeses. This was a regular Fear Factor candypalooza: hard candy embedded with authentic creepies as well as a straightforward box of "bacon and cheese" flavored crickets.

The Worm Candy watermelon flavored sucker lists the following ingredients: hydrogenated starch, hydrolysate, insect larva, artificial flavoring and color. The Amber InsectNside candy lists the same ingredients, except instead of "insect larva," it says, "scorpion."


Both are manufactured by Hotlix

The other interesting thing in this photo is the manuscript upon which the candy is arranged. It is the last page of a short story by my buddy Steve Hayward. The final sentence is circled in red and there looks to be some brilliant comment by yours truly (I have since returned the critiqued piece and cannot remember what it says).

You can read this article I wrote about Hayward or better yet get your hands on a copy of his stunning novel The Secret Mitzvah of Lucio Burke. You can enjoy it while sucking dried scorpion guts out of your Hotlix yum-yum.

*My kid and her posse of 9- and 10-year-old terror mongers ate the crickets. I still have the Amber InstectNside and Worm Candy. Maybe I'll pack them into my Dearly Beloved's lunch.


Dean said...

How weird is this? Just two days ago, on Saturday, I was looking at that very same candy in the gift shop of the Bug Zoo, where I and my daughter held cockroaches two inches long, a millipede a foot long, and I held a tarantula that filled my hand. She had gleaming black fangs nearly a half-inch in length.

Carol said...

WOW. . . I can't believe that the kids actually ate the crickets. Did they like them? Will they eat broccoli with the same fervor? Or was it the bacon flavor that put them over the top? (This coming from someone who believes that bacon should be a food group of its own). Are they game to eat the hardcandy? Maybe you should record them on your webcam and show the world.

FLAMINGO1 said...

This proves my theory that anything wrapped in bacon is better.

I had not considered crickets, but if I had to choose between a cricket or a cricket wrapped in bacon, I would select the cricket wrapped in bacon. I think most people would - other than Kristen from MA.

n said...

this is a great time of year to have fun with the kids. I use to freeze stuff in ice cubes and serve it to my daughter and her friends. Ah the good old days.Okay ,ganna read that link...

Roxi said...

fuck that shit thats gross as fuck.

Dean said...

F1, that's because anything wrapped in bacon tastes like... bacon.

Hmmm. Flamingo wrapped in bacon. That might be good.

sleepydog said...


Just. Ew. I love you Erin, but I will not eat bugs for you. I have to draw the line somewhere ;)

wwwriter said...

Hey...I remember the time you ran a promo story on that same haunted house for the magazine you edited. You about scared the pants off of somebody when they opened the mailbox to retrieve the magazine and saw the cover, which had a very scary dude on it with blood and shit (something like that anyway)...ALWAYS a trouble maker, huh, Erin?

Satan said...

i happen to love scorpions

before the night is through i will be knocking hooves with erin and roxi

i am too much demon to resist

Anonymous said...

gross. I thought you weer talking about bug shaped candy not real bug candy. EWWWWW

Roxi said...

I just wanna say.. holla.. satan is back

~d said...

Me? Erin? ME? I like the wasabi stuff earlier!

Put wasabi on dem derrr crickets.....

Dean said...

Tilde, doll, that's a brilliant idea. Wasabi crickets! We can corner the market.

PDD said...

Firstly, I am trying to recover from my busted gut due to Pinky's comment regarding Kristen from MA. Not only is Pinky funny, he's got a great memory.

I read your fabulous article on Steve Hayward. And I have to say I can relate to alot to what Hayward has said regarding the restrictions Canada has on Candadian artists.

I am going to speak in my area of expertise, film. It almost seems imposible to get fudning for feature film projects if your material does not involve homosexuality, nudity, Eskomos, and of course, long stretches of prairies that take up 20 minutes of celluloid.

Canada is a young and timid country observing the world, and in particular their neighbouring counrty, America. While Canada likes to pride itself on independence and individuality, it's simply not so. They are the American followers. Just look at corporate Alberta. Need I say more? But not all provinces in Canada are like Alberta. Alberta is a rare exception. (As far as I am concerned they should just amalgamate with America.) Okay, I am brancing off. I am drinking wine. Give me a break. Thank you.

Back to my point, Canada is a young and timid country who doesn't want to step out beyond it's means. The inhibition: Money. Canadians don't have as much money as Americans do. And lets face it, America gives us alot of work, which means bread and butter on our table. Really, if it weren't for America Canada would be a full blown communitst country (we aren't that far from that).

I am not trying to put down Canada, but sometimes this country is too scared to branch out and trust its own instincts where it makes me sick and angry. I have said it before and I will say it again, it's a young and insecure country watching everyone else, and how everyone else does things. Hence the uneasiness of taking a chance on a concept or someone.

There is a saying, "Americans mentality is 'How much money can we make?' whereas Candadians mentality is 'How much money are we going to have to spend?'" And that statement alone makes all the difference.

God I belong in Europe.

P.S. You wrote a wonderful article, Erin.