Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Beer summit?

Our darling Ohio Republican Representative Robert Mecklenborg has finally resigned after getting arrested for DUI under dubious circumstances last April.

I'd love to play matchmaker between Anthony Weiner and Robert Mecklenborg. They could meet up for a Beer Summit.
Weiner: "I didn't even touch that girl."

Mecklenborg: "Neither did I, but man-o-man I sure came close. And I HATE wasting a dose of Viagra like that--If ya know what I mean."

Weiner: "You? You've got no complaints. No one called for your resignation. You weren't on CNN's front page for days on end."

Mecklenborg (with a rheumy smile): "I know. Ya shoulda picked Ohio. Ya shoulda picked the other party. Hell, a tweet? No one would ever have said a thing." (knocks back a shot of Jameson) "Christ awmighty, I got flat-out busted for driving drunk and hardly anyone noticed. As long as you wave the flag, talk pro-life and pro-gun, they don't care what you do."
For a poetic touch, maybe they could have this blessed exchange in the brand-spanking-new fully stocked bar* in the Ohio State House.

Beautiful. Just beautiful.

*Yo Gov? Are we allowed to take our guns in your new bar too?

* * *


Harry Finch said...

Every workplace should have a bar. It would get me into the office early, even on holidays.

alphadog said...

Oh fercrissake, a fine Irisher you are, can't even spell Jameson's properly.
And in answer to your question, from your provided link, "One thing that will not be allowed: Guns."

Erin O'Brien said...


Alph gets me twice: on a misspelling (that I shall correct) and proof I didn't my own link all the way through!

Cleveland Bob said...

While I REALLY dig the news in this post, Erin, I will have to pile on and join alphadog in his disappointment of the disconnect of your Irish roots and your misspelling of Jameson.

Oddly though, the spelling that you selected is my dear, departed mother's maiden name, so, there's that.

Oh swell, I just gave out my mother's maiden name over the innertubes...now I'm certain to get what's left of my ID stolen.

Anyhoo, Mecklenborg did the right thing and resigned. Credit to you and Connie Schultz. Let's hope the voters of his District make a better choice in his replacement. Cheers.

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

The winner of the Indy 500 receives the Borg-Warner trophy. Maybe they should come up with a "Dumb Ass of the Year" award for politicians. It could be called the 'Borg-Weiner trophy.

Note: the previous was a commentary on stupid things done by stupid people, and not a political commentary. Both these guys qualify as dumb asses if you ask me.


Bill said...

Al: Careful now! We're just waiting to catch you breaking that no politics pledge.

Erin O'Brien said...

Leave Al alone. After all, Bill, he's one of the few other righties you've got around here.

Al, you say what you want. We practice free speech here at the Owner's Manual--well, save for hate speech and libelous comments, but you get the drift.

Anonymous said...

Both parties are filled with idiots,now back to vacation watching girls in really small bathing suits and drinking beer.

James Old Guy

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

@ James: Funny, that's what I did this past weekend while on a houseboat trip to TN.

@ Bill: Sticking to my pledge here. And Erin knows why.

@ Erin: Thanks. BTW, I will be in your neck of the woods starting Wednesday of next week, through Sunday.


Anonymous said...

Al-'Borg-Weiner was pretty good.
Mike R

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

@ Mike: I thought so too. Say, how about some other "trophies" ....

The Ted Kennedy Trophy - awarded for safe driving.
The John Edwards Trophy - awarded for being a total scumbag to your spouse who has cancer.
The Gerald R. Ford Trophy - awarded for grace and coordination.
The Richard M. Nixon Trophy - awarded for honesty whilst in office.
The George W. Bush Trophy - awarded for significant achievements while uttering words in the English language. Strategery!
The James E. Carter Trophy - awarded for the ability to be a great carpenter but a lousy President, all at the same time.
The Dennis Kucinich Trophy - awarded for being the village idiot.
The Art Modell Trophy - awarded for being a liar, a crappy businessman, and all around @sshole. Oh, and for being a traitor, too.
The Le Bron James Trophy - awarded for quitting when it really counts.
The Albert Belle Trophy - awarded for significant contributions to the cork industry.
The Jim Brown Trophy - awarded for absolute refusal to believe the 60s have ended.
The Hillary Clinton Trophy - awarded for patience and the ability to suffer endless humiliation.

And finally ... The Erin E. O'Brien Trophy - awarded for great writing. Oh, and for guided tours of the West Side Market, too.

And the beat goes on ....