Thursday, June 17, 2010

The Life of O'Brien

So I'm on my regular five-mile walk, mumbling to myself and thinking my usual moronic and disconnected thoughts.

Don't be an asshole.

Yeah, but Robin Meade IS a lot younger than you.

You either left it in your purse or it's on the dresser.

I come upon a stack of boxes in a garbage pile. (Regular readers of this blog know that I pay close attention to all detritus on the road. Why, just the other day, I found a personal check, which I picked up, inspected, and then called the number in the left hand corner and arranged to return said check to the relieved checking account owner before he was obliged to make a stop payment, which is exactly the type of pro-karma activity that was about to pay off.)

The boxes were full of vintage print. Oh darling joy of life!

There were tons of booklets from county and state fairs and kitschy decorating guides from the 50's and 60's. I pulled out beekeeping guides, the 1966 Sears Business Equipment and Supply Catalog and home handyman booklets such as the 1957 Sherwin-Williams Home Decorator and How-to-Paint Book.

Rabbit books. The Chevrolet Story from 1961.

I'll bet Lucy will get me a few bucks on eBay and dig that old Montgomery Ward catalog.

They had chickens for sale in there!

Then lookie lookie lookie what else was in the piles:

Vintage porn! This Raw Flix is denoted as Volume One/Number One/Summer 1967. It features stills from skin flicks of the day. No ads, published quarterly by Health Knowlege, Inc. NY, NY.

But this is definitely my fave--a May 1967 copy of DUDE (60¢). It was neatly ripped in two, perhaps the work of a furious wife or girlfriend.

I don't know about you, but I was smoldering with curiosity over "The Erotic Power of Hypnosis."

I loved the ad copy in the back. Oh? And that hypnosis article? Here's an excerpt:
But what about the amateur who wants neither to cure anyone of nervous disorders or to put on a show for a large audience? Suppose he just wants to put someone--say, a big-bosomed blonde--UNDER HIS CONTROL--in private.

Well, it may come as a surprise to some of the doubting Thomases, but his chances are pretty good. Now here comes the if. IF he knows what he's doing.
Fortunately for the big-bosomed blonde contingent of 1967, I think that "IF" was a fairly prohibitive stumbling block for DUDE clientele.

The classies are a riot, but oddly familiar to anyone who's perused a 2010 spam folder:
YOUNG ENGLISH GIRL wants to hear from any gentleman interested in obtaining photos, slides, negs or films of an unusual nature. Send no money, just write to ...
See what I mean? There's an ad for teeth whitener in here. What are the chances it's exactly the same stuff advertised on my Yahoo inbox page?

RAM enterprises had a Sandy doll for sale, "You'll like her," says the copy, "everyone does in the end!" The address lists Mentor, Ohio, which is east of Cleveland. I wonder if they're still in business.

There is one big difference. Save for these hand-draw boobs in the lingerie ads, all the boobs in these rags are real.

* * *


(S)wine said...

that is a brilliant score. with the porn as the cherry on top
(word verification: "audcur" aud cur in Romanian means: I hear ass)

LimesNow said...

You know, I'd pay a fee to come to Cleveland and share in some of your walks. You're aware I far outdo you in miles per day, but - by god - I can't hold a candle to you in terms of "find". Yes, the porn was wonderful, but something else grabbed me. It's about the chickens. I was pleased to see they were delivered 100% live. If I bought 3-4 week old started chickens (STARTED?) and they arrived 50% or 67.5% alive, I'd be pissed off.

B.E. Earl said...

That's a box of pure gold.

Erin O'Brien said...

Dig the note right above the pic of the chickens.

I bet it was a MAJOR chicken bummer to get put in the "debeaking" line.

Thanks, all. Wish you were here to dig this mags. I'll post more from them in coming days. What a gas!

philbilly said...

Where to begin...

philbilly said...

For starters, the blond on the cover of Raw Flix Volume One/Number One/Summer 1967 is the spit and image of an old girlfriend. I've just spent 20 minutes staring at that photo. I have a memory of her in nearly that exact pose by a river, wearing that exact clothing, or lack thereof, and those exact nipples 'neath wet linen, even the smile, the dimpled chin. She was not born in '67 otherwise I would swear this was her. Thank you, Erin, and bless you. Wow.

WV; holyge, as in "Holy ge-bus, it's her!"

Big Mark 243 said...

First, I am glad to hear appreciation for Robin Meade. She has a real world beauty to her. It could be that she is off the track so to speak, not on everyone's lists of 'best looking this' and 'best looking that' that magazines like People and US Weekly popularizes.

The old catalogs would have made the entire find for me. I can see myself decorating my place (once I move to 'my place') with pages from the catalog AND salvage what I could from the girlie mags.

Anywho... great find and yes, I think it was reward for returning the check... what you discovered is worth more than the fee that would have been paid on stop payment for the check...

LimesNow said...

GOOD point, EO'B ~ I imagine debeaking would break a chicken's spirit and make pecking for food very difficult. Yikes!

philbilly said...

Speaking of hotness, I just watched an old episode of Bat Masterson and he was caught up in the usual imbroglio which included a smokin hot brunette. I waited patiently for the credits and who was she?

Why, Erin O'Brien, of course.

Anonymous said...

"Honey, there's that strange little walking woman going through our trash again. You think we oughta give her a sandwich or somethin?"


DogsDontPurr said...

Great great find!

My guess is you might have some luck on ebay with the Chevrolet story. I always had good fortune with vintage car literature. And anything marked volume 1/number 1 has a good chance too. Stuff like this was very popular in my shop. I finally had to put all vintage paperwork in a display case because it would get so thumbed through.

I absolutely love finds like this! You don't know how many times I slammed on the breaks and turned back around to examine a garbage pile. Heck, I made a living at it!

(Also, I was born in May of 67, the Summer of Love. So there's that.)

Jim do little said...

Treasure on a treelawn! This post was great! Half price books may be interested!

Bill said...

How to grow a mustache and amaze your friends! That must be a great article. It's the last one on the cover of the Dude mag. Can you share the gist of that article with us Erin? I'm curious about how a mustache will amaze your friends. The possibilities are endless I guess.

Erin O'Brien said...

An amazing mustache.

Mr. L said...

The tooth whitener probably IS the exact same stuff....only now it's supposedly for "male enhancement". :)

Glass Houses said...

I'd be very interested to read "Who Says Burlesque Is Dead?"

I'm involved with the Cleveland burlesque revival going on now and it would be interesting to see what the thoughts were at that time.

alphadog said...

In '67 I found a copy of 'Nylon Jungle' that featured a photo spread of someone who looked remarkably like a neighbor. It was found in the field next to your house and across the street from said neighbor. Good old Mom found it and it went directly to the trash where it was later recovered and spirited away to the tree house.
I don't remember what became of the rag or know what became of the neighbor, but for a while it was pure gold for a twelve year old.

sybil law said...

Also, back then, women were generally sporting the full on bush, but did they even show that in those magazines?
(And, hi! Here via B.E Earl!)