Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Things that scare me about my husband, vol. V


Previously, on "Things that scare me about my husband."

10 comments:

deangc said...

I'd be scared too. 1. He's attempted to hide the plate number on the car. Why would he do that unless he's planning on using it as the getaway car in, say, a jewelry store heist? (that's one way to get through a recession).

But! 2. He's used orange twine as a hood hold-down. Given the nature of jewelry store heists and getaway cars, I question his judgement. Imagine him skidding around the icy streets of East Fuckburg, Ohio (because only a crazy person robs a jewelry store in his own city), cops in pursuit, and the orange twine breaks.

Bill the wrenchbender said...

LOL! I take it the hood latch has frozen open, that's pretty creative.
If that is yarn or twine. I wouldn't trust it, if it is wire, he'll be just fine.

Erin O'Brien said...

First off, I have to come clean and say that the Goat has already done the real repair and the hood of his Mercury is snugly in place without benefit of any supplemental closure device.

Dean, that sounds like a scene from "Smokey and the Bandit." So funny: the image of the speeding getaway car with the hood up!

Bill, it was wire.

Zen Wizard said...

A car hood should really be secured with baling twine that meets or exceeds NHTSA crash and burn tests before one ventures onto a crowded highway--some minor detail about your hood flying up and blocking your vision while you are doing 90-mph in rush hour or some piddly shit "Safety Nazi" hair they have up their asses.

philbilly said...

WD-40, chicken soup for machinery.

Make that secondary, annoying safety latch is still functioning, not just pushed out of play.

Avoid white lithium grease like the plague, grease in general attracts dirt, grit and light colored clothing.

Having a hood come up on the freeway is a special kind of thrill.

Dad said...

Erin,

Clearly, your goat is a very handy goat as goats go. Do not be ashamed! It seems like he is all man and could fix just about anything.

Now I know what to send you for Christmas... rubber bands, paper clips and duct tape. The goat is one handy mother fucker!

Rory L. Aronsky said...

It's not true, is it Erin? The Goat can't possibly be cheating on you with Raggedy Ann.

Rory L. Aronsky said...

It's not true, is it Erin? The Goat can't possibly be cheating on you with Raggedy Ann.

Goat said...

Looking at my former endeavors, I see I did not scare you at all in 2008. I have many plans for 2009. Beware

(S)wine said...

I love it. It works.