Monday, April 17, 2006

Query

IM thread courtesy of your humble hostess and her trusted associate, Bailey.

O'Brien: Hey Bailey?

Bailey: Yeah, O'Brien?

O'Brien: What is the texture of a woman's mouth like?

Bailey: A woman's mouth? Why do you ask?

O'Brien: Just curious.

Bailey: Possibly an understatement.

O'Brien: What's that supposed to mean?

Bailey: Go ask Ann Curry.

O'Brien: She cut her hair, you know.

Bailey: And would you still wash it?

O'Brien: Of course I would still wash it.

Bailey: That’s a line from a favorite song of mine. “She cut her hair and I stopped loving her.”

O'Brien: Bailey, what the eff are you talking about?

Bailey: Sorry. What were you asking again? Got sidetracked on the hair/song thing.

O'Brien: I'm not talking about her hair, Bailey, I'm talking about her mouth, the texture of her mouth.

Bailey: Smooth, I guess. Though who knows? Maybe Ann Curry's mouth feels like corduroy.

O'Brien: No way does Ann Curry's mouth feel like corduroy.

Bailey: Maybe her lips make a vwipping sound when she kisses.

O'Brien: Vwipping? No vwipping. Mouth texture, Bailey, mouth texture.

Bailey: I dunno. What is the texture of a man's mouth like?

O'Brien: It's like a mouth. Teeth, tongue. Lips.

Bailey: I am pretty sure a woman's mouth has these same features.

O'Brien: But I'm not talking about features. I'm talking about texture. I'll bet a woman's mouth feels way different than a man's.

Bailey: I bet it does. I bet it feels a lot less like corduroy.

O'Brien: Hm …

Bailey: Let's ask someone who has kissed both.

O'Brien: Who?

Bailey: I don’t know. Not me.

O'Brien: Not me either.

Bailey: Not you yet.

O'Brien: Bailey!

Bailey: How about Complete Game?

O'Brien: Bailey!

Bailey: O'Brien?

O'Brien: Hey, I know. What about posting the question on my blog?

Bailey: Sure. Why not? Someone in that orgy ought to know.

O'Brien: Then that's what I'll do. And I shall reference you as the impetus. I might even use this effing thread!

Bailey: But this shirt makes me look fat. Edit it so that I am typing in a different shirt. Something slimming.

O'Brien: Stop acting like a girl, Bailey.

Bailey: Okay, fine. But if you do use this thread, make sure you cut out that one part.

O'Brien: Which part?

Bailey: You know which part. The part about the whipped cream and the hip-waders.

O'Brien: Absolutely. Consider it cut.

Bailey: And the part with that elaborate pulley system I told you about.

O'Brien: Won't mention a thing about it.

Bailey: And that thing I have for Whammo stuff.

O'Brien: You can trust me.

Bailey: Promise?

O'Brien: Of, course, Bailey. I'm stunned you should even think to ask twice.

17 comments:

PDD said...

A womans mouth is different than a mans, but not a huge difference.

doris day said...

totally different! women have softer mouths and there's no annoying stubble....

PDD said...

Hey Erin!
I sent you an email earlier today. It's important so please get back to me as soon as you are able.

Thanks Darling,

PDD

Hal said...

I agree with Bailey, in that the best answer to this question will come from someone who swings from both sides of the plate.

Erin O'Brien said...

Looks like we have conflicting opinions from Doris Day and Psychic Dumb Dumb. We have also learned about the love affair between Denny and (ahem) Lola. Then there is Hal, who has not brought a whole lot to the table other than a baseball reference.

Considering the hundreds of hits this site has gotten since I posted this yesterday, I'd thought Bailey and I would have a few more responses.

Come on, people! Who out there has done the tongue tango with both Adam and Eve?

Toby said...

Daddy says I'm the best.

Roxi said...

Done both.. its not the texture that is different.. its the style..

Girls are softer kissers.. smoother tounges.. soft and yeilding..

dudes are hard and needy.. they have hard tounge and make alot of flicks and swirls..

So all in all its not the texture that is different its the style that is used.

Velvet Fog said...

I've had sword-fights in many lands. I can honestly say that I notice no difference. But then I am usually cranked on yam-yam, so I rarely know where, or in whom I am sticking it.

jamwall said...

i've been known to dress like a little girl when i'm cranked on yam-yam..

Erin O'Brien said...

toby: Who's my sugar daddy, baby? Huh? Aren't I your sweet baby? Didn't drip all over you like hot caramel last time? Huh, baby?

roxi and steel (wow--that could be the name of a band)--finally some good sensible commentary on the topic.

Dong, I've missed you. But what is this yam-yam of which you and jamwall speak? Where does one procure it? Will I dress like a little boy if I consume it? Has it anything to do with the Flinstones character Bam-Bam? jamwell? Dong? can you help me out here?

Toby said...

Erin, carmel isn't the best comparison/anaolgy, but if I have one burned sugar momma, you're it. You can drip on me anytime, just mind where the hot drips drip.

Anyway, I left a long comment here leading to a story I just posted, but alas, my needyness has gotten the best of me once again because somehow I managed not to post it. I had no way to leave anything relevant as ....

egan said...

Aw, the comments are on now. I got some unporn to watch.

FLAMINGO1 said...

I was hoping to find a response from Complete Game.

He is a dirty pirate hooker.

Erin O'Brien said...

Flamingo! Baby!

Pants off! I promise! Please, baby, please, don't leave me again ....

I'll behave from now on. No more slutting around with the likes of Dongley. No more cheap lingerie and Kraft Macaroni dinners. Just stay with me, baby .... Okay? Purr?

Purr purr purr purr? Purr?

FLAMINGO1 said...

It's precisely your slutting around that makes me love you so...don't change a hair for me.

Free time has been scarce lately. I am on today because I am too hung over to work.

Sean Santa said...

the inside of a girls mouth is like being in the middle of a plane crash made of goosedown

i think...

L,

Sean

Glass Houses said...

Man, this is way long ago, but I'm bored and so I'm on an Erin binge.

There is something to the "style" theory, but there really is a difference in texture as well. I attribute it to the use of lip balms, glosses, etc.

Also, girls tend to explore more...running tongues over lips and teeth, nipping, etc.