Thursday, June 13, 2013

Mystifying toe dot saga

Feet of Erin O'Brien. Click to enlarge.

Dear friends,

If you scrutinize today's graphic, you'll find a dot on the nail of my left big toe. No, the dot is not evidence that your humble hostess has failed to practice proper hygiene. From what I can tell--and the dot has been there for several weeks--the dot is inside the nail. I've scrubbed and scrubbed. I cannot figure out the dot. I don't remember impacting my toe in any way that would cause a tiny bruise on the nail.

Who the hell gets a dot on their toe nail?

I am not pleased to admit the following: I think the dot is moving along with the growing nail. What if the dot gets to the top and a tiny insect emerges? Or a little worm? Should I go to the hospital? Maybe the Evil Overlord of the entire universe is about to emerge from the tip of my left big toe. Should I call the police? Harry Potter? The suspense is killing me.

Of course, I could just act like nothing's going on and paint the blasted thing.

Who needs reality TV when you've got human drama like this? Kim Kardashian can kiss my ass.



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Elisson said...

The dot is probably a tiny blood clot under the nail. It will gradually be pushed forward by new growth until it is eventually trimmed off.

Either that, or it is a spore from some horrible space alien species that is waiting to be released upon the world, whereupon we will all become brain-eating zombies. Slurred shouts of "Pass the black butter and capers!" will resound through the land.

Me, I'm going with the blood clot theory.

glittermom said...

I advise nail polish and you'll never know its there...and who doesn't paint their toe nails?

Anonymous said...

You may have eaten something that disagreed with you. There is a body response where you can see dramatic changes in colour if you had been poisoned with something or other. Moons of something or other, ask a medical person you know.

Anonymous said...

DogsDontPurr said...

I usually get one of these a day or two after I inadvertently roll over my toe with the laundry cart. It's like a little bruise or scab that eventually grows out or fades away.

But, as Elisson said, could just be a mild case of the Zombies.

Anonymous said...

Hiya e*,

If the dot opens up and there's a tiny little guy mumbling something about "Orion's Belt" it might be prudent to notify the authorities.

You haven't been playing an overly vigorous round of Tic-Dot-Toe, have you? That'll nail ya every time. In any event, don't worry-it's kind of cute-icle.

*I just found a volume of ee cummings from high school. As an homage I will refer to you as 'e' for as long as it takes me to forget to do it.

Anonymous said...

@ glittermom - ugh, gross

twinklysparkles said...

And now for TMI:

Last OCTOBER (in all caps, yes), a friend of mine put an armchair down on my L big toe and sat down. OUCH!!!

I got a small bloody spot outside of my toenail, but also the toenail was impacted. Fortunately my toenail did not crack. It is now June and my toe design, which is rather dark dark red with a white spot in it, has still not reached the top of my toenail. SO LONG it takes to grow out.

I am sure you bruised it but you don't remember.

I hope I get through my whole life with all of my nails intact. This was just a tiny adventure.

XO, Katherine