Wednesday, February 04, 2009

The finches suck

I sit on the couch in the front window to read, edit manuscripts or sometimes I just sip a whiskey and stare like one of those statues on Easter Island.

There is a thistle feeder right outside the window. The finches feed at it constantly whether I'm sitting there or not.

I was going over an essay this morning and they were all out there, shoveling down the thistle.

"Look at those fat motherfuckers," I said to the Goat. He gazed out at them. The finches pecked at the feeder in response. "Look at that one," I said as a particularly fat finch bellied up to the trough. "That's not a bird, it's a feathered softball with a beak for chrissake."

"They do like their thistle," said the Goat.

"I'm taking a picture," I said and got up to get the camera.

But as soon as I pointed it at the little bastards, they flew away. So I waited. And waited and waited. Eventually, I put the camera down. They all flew back onto the feeder. So I picked the camera up and they all flew away. I waited. The finches waited. I put the camera down. The finches came back. Can you believe these ungrateful little shits?

So this is the best I can do. You'll just have to take my word for it and imagine the rest.

15 comments:

Amy L. Hanna said...

I can only imagine what the finches might have been thinking of the grumbling humans inside.

Zen Wizard said...

They are probably camera shy after those tabloids ran those pictures of them doing a bong hit.

Anonymous said...

Union finches. No photos during lunch. Call their agent.

RJ

Haik Bedrosian said...

Those darn finches. They must make working from the comfort of home such a drag.

Kirk Jusko said...

You should have offered them your whiskey. I bet they would have sat still then.

Hal said...

Damn, there's a lot of snow on the ground in C-town!

Geoff Schutt said...

Nobody has asked this, so I will. What brand of whiskey do you drink? I'm into Evan Williams, which actually qualifies as bourbon, though it goes down the throat with the burn that you'd expect from its economical price.

vancemac said...

You have to be real sneaky......http://twitpic.com/1214q

(S)wine said...

whisky=Johnnie w. for me
bourbon = turkey
single malt = will take any

you?

Erin O'Brien said...

Canadian Club.

Erin O'Brien said...

... or Crown Royal once in a while.

glittergirl said...

our dogs do something similar. they will play and run around, and do some really funny things. but as soon as you get the camera out, they stop.

i've been known to curse & make not-so-veiled threats to the dogs, to no avail.

it reminds me of that frog from the cartoons, that sang & danced (i think he wore a top hat...) except when anyone was looking.

Mone said...

I'll always get some education on your page, Erin. I needed to google "thistle feeder ", had no idea what was meant by it. Well, I know now but I still dont really get it. We call a thistle a plant with huge thorns, but what does it has to do with the feeder? Wondering :)

Kirk Jusko said...

The cartoon with the frog is ONE FROGGY EVENING directed by the late, great Chuck Jones, and he did wear a hat.

He's now called Michigan J. Frog and is logo for the WB network.

Anonymous said...

Mone--
It is the same plant here. The birds love the seed of the plant and since the seeds are so small a special feeder is needed.