Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Hippie goddess?

There is a contingent of anonymous shitbags who like to call me names and hurl insults at me. Sometimes they do it on these pages, sometimes they do it on other blogs and forums. I think they are mostly middle-aged conservative men, but who knows? After all, they're anonymous shitbags. One of the things they like to "accuse" me of is being a hippie chick.

I suppose, based on this photo of me when I was eight and the fact that I own a vial of patchouli oil, I could be described thusly. But whether or not "hippie chick" applies to me, I don't take it as an insult. After all, there's plenty of men who will pay good money to view photos of nude hippie chick earth goddesses.

( ... shhhh ... be very quiet ... hear that? It's the sound of all the conservative middle-aged anonymous shitbags pulling out their credit cards in order to join that site ... )

I was lunching with an old pal yesterday and this very subject came up. He was lauding the virtues of women who prefer to go au naturale.

"I'm talking about your full 70's bush."

We discussed vintage Playboys and the sad status of today's Playmates and how razors and Photoshop have reduced the adult female form to an impossible pedophiliac cartoon (I have blogged about this before). We talked about how the hair on our bodies, like our sexuality, is animalistic.

"Why remove the one thing that enhances the animalistic nature of sex?"

Although I have no intention of revealing my own grooming habits, do know that I like me some hairy guys. Big hairy guys with beer! Yay!

So boys, maybe that twentysomething chickie wants you baby-bottom smooth, but this fortysomething hippie chick loves you just the way you are.


Anonymous said...

Is that tie dye? I remember making my own tie dye shirts.

Erin O'Brien said...

That sure was a DIY tie-dye. Did it at summer camp. My folks took this pic when they picked me up.

Zen Wizard said...

Soon 70's bush will be the only form of rainforest that the world has left!

LoDoKid said...

But Erin darling, you can have it both ways~


Erin O'Brien said...

Zen, THAT was funny.

LoDo--I have learned something today, thank you.

deangc said...

Hippie-chick-type dude (who you know I find infinitely more attractive than 10,000 spray-painted Hefneresque bags of silicone n' surgery):

The hairlessness thing is not pedophilic. A shaved adult woman doesn't look like a prepubescent. No, the shaved look is porn-star chic, part of the 'I'm unique just like everyone else' body-mod fad.

Kirk Jusko said...

Hippie chick? I think you're a little young. According to your profile, you're 42. If I'm doing my math right, you would have been 3 at the time of Woodstock.

It could be worse. You could be accused of being a Beatnik Chick, or a Flapper Chick.

For some of us, the flappers, beatniks, and hippies are the most interesting things about the '20s, '50s and '60s.

Incidentally, I don't own a computer. I use the one at the library. I almost got kicked out for clicking on Nude Erin!

Kirk Jusko said...

I meant "Erin O'brien Naked" See how flustered it made me?

(S)wine said...

Two years ago I read that in Korea women are actually opting for adding MORE hair to the area in question. Amen to that sistahs.

Erin O'Brien said...

Dean: I am talking about the way they photoshop the genital area in order to make them look so colorless and polite--ugh. Plus, I've always said, if you really want to go to bed with someone, you will find them desirable in the nude no matter what.

KJ: I might be nekkid in that pic, but there's no reason for it to get you the boot! erf erf erf!

s(w)ine: That's heartening news.

Bill the wrenchbender said...

With, without, it's all good!

Diane Vogel Ferri said...

I would consider Hippie-Chick to be a compliment.

Erin O'Brien said...

Bill, I love a man who is easy to please.

Diane-- I agree!

josh williams said...

Grooming is all fine and dandy but grooming to the point that we deny our status as mortals? Airbrush turned me off Playboy years ago not to mention the articles that appeal to the early twenties male.
Back in the day I had one of my dads Playboys hidden in my brothers room,he had a small access door to the attic, this woman was hot, not photo shopped, not airbrushed but boy did I think she was the bomb,this was even before the Bush elimination. (kinda political)
But you know I really was attracted to this woman among others pre-puberty. Guys are guys and we like women, the trends are just that,and have nothing to do with reality.
You know I just thought is the very same vintage Playboy laying in the attic, or has it found a new home or just put in the trash bin labeled sin.
I was a wee lad, but she was just fine as a the girl next door.

philbilly said...

What's so funny 'bout piece, love and understanding?

A whiff of patchouli always reminds me of that sweet hippie girl who jumped my shy bones back in the early 70's, beads, incense, sitar music, the whole shebang. Candlelight, nature's airbrush.

Erin O'Brien said...

JW--The Bush elimination? Aha! So that's what they're calling it these days.

Phil--Candles! Why, that's brilliant! I'll just light the joint with candles!

hoosierboy said...

Boy, I am sure glad I have a hairy chest and back (just the lower part above my crack). Now I know why you loves me so.

Erin O'Brien said...

HB--Of course we love you, baby. Like philbilly says, it's all about peace, love and understanding around here.

Anonymous said...

Peace, love and music. Best sex of my life was with an unshorn(?) hippie chick who also didn't shave her legs or under her arms.
As a matter of fact were it not for free love I'd probably still be a virgin.

All Hail The Hippie Chick!


Erin O'Brien said...

RJ, if "unshorn" is not a word, it certainly should be.

Velvet Fog said...

My friend Dongley Shlongford and I LOVE it when you talk bush.

Erin O'Brien said...

Fog, for some reason I feel certain you and your distinguished associate are the utmost authorities on the subject.

Kirk Jusko said...

OK, I've re-read your post because I think I might be missing something. Please bear with me.

The first couple of paragraphs dealt with conservative middle-aged men who call you a "hippie." Now, I took "conservative" to mean either politically or socially conservative or both (nowadays they are one and the same thing, but it was not always. William Jennings Bryan, a fundementalist Christian who opposed the teaching of evolution, was to the left of Ralph Nader when it came to economics.) I assumed they disagreed with you on the great issues of the day, and that was their way of getting revenge.

After that you offer a link to pictures of nude women, whom you say are hippies. As I said in an earlier comment, I read this stuff in the library. When something like that pops up on the screen, I have to look at it PRETTY FUCKING FAST! Yes, yes, I know I have a First Amendment right to ogle those pictures for a good, long time, and there's nothing the librarians can do about it as long as my drool doesn't hit the keyboard and short-circuit everything. But I have enough problems in my life. Let someone else be an ACLU test case. At any rate, I didn't get a good look. I don't know if those are pictures of actual hippies, or what. I also didn't get a good look to see if there was hair or not. As soon as I saw nipples I clicked off. Like I said, I'm at the library.

After that, it's the conversation about Playboy, shaven, airbrushed girls, etc. I actually thought you were changing the subject at that point, and the nude pics were just a bridge. You did end it with a hippie chick liking hairy guys, but I assumed that was just bringing the two disparate strands together. That's why in MY comment, I compared hippies to beatniks and flappers--noncomformists--and addressed the "bush" issue only obliquely ("kicked out of the library".)

Now that I've read over all the other comments, I wonder, did you mean those men were "conservative", not for political reasons, but because they liked girls shaven, and thus called you a "hippie" because they assumed you weren't?

Or, was the whole thing meant to be fun, and I'm taking it WAY too seriously?

Geoff Schutt said...

Erin -- This post -- and some version of the comments thereafter -- deserves an entire chapter in the "Erin: Girl Reporter" book, whenever you get set to write it.

I'm just sitting here, nodding my head, smiling.

Ken Houghton said...

"I think they are mostly middle-aged conservative men,"

hey! I represent that remark!

Why do all the hippie chicks have Very Obvious Ribcages? Did they not eat enough??

Anonymous said...

As a conservative middle-aged anonymous shitbag, I must say if I'm going to pull out my plastic to join a site, it won't be to join sites that venerate nude hippie chick earth goddesses. But that's just me.

As far as hairy dudes, I'm hairy and getting hairier (according to my wife). Some women like it, some don't, and that's cool. Razors and electric shears are good things I suppose.

The Only Republican in Vermont

Rory L. Aronsky said...

As far as hairy dudes, I'm hairy and getting hairier

I think my arm hair can now take Robin Williams' arm hair in a fight.

Erin O'Brien said...

KJ: You cannot know how much I love the image of you going "yikes!" upon opening my naughty links in the library.

I imagine the men who call me a "hippie chick" are politically conservative. I've no idea how they feel on the topic of hirsute women. Other than that, the post was written quickly and just for fun, with lots o' links to give readers something to look at whilst I'm effing around with a million things.

Geoff: The research for that chapter would be very interesting.

Ken: But you are Ken! And you do not hurl insults! As far as the chicks go, maybe you should offer to buy one of them lunch.

Um, Al? You are not anonymous.

Rory: Even if it was "Popeye" Robin Williams?

Mack said...

Razor bumps suck!

Hal said...

Every year during the Oscars, Mr. Skin.com gives out - among others - the "George W. Bush Award."

Perverted friends told me this. I would never deign to go to a site like that.

dudesworthy said...

I dig Hippy chicks. Totally.

But then again I was born in the 80's so naturally I find the idea of a value system that isn't based upon the acquisition of mass produced consumer items from East Asia to be otherworldly and exotic.

Amy L. Hanna said...

Wow, nothing yet from The Dean on this subject? Shocking indeed.

As far as the topic goes I'll just say that as for myself, I'm groomed where it counts, and you can snip whatever conclusion you like.


Erin O'Brien said...

Mack: Indubitably.

Hal: What a perfect way to commemorate Our President.

Dude: Home come I can buy a tiny plastic Santa (made in China) from the discount store for 25 cents, but it costs me 42 cents to mail a letter to Akron?

Amy: check again. Wasn't Dean the 6th comment? And I'm with you, mums the word!

Rory L. Aronsky said...

Rory: Even if it was "Popeye" Robin Williams?


Anonymous said...


Thanks for reminding me I'm not forgotten up here in the land of socialism. Speaking of which ...

I saw a bumper sticker today, on a car no less, that read:

"Vermont - Socialist paradise. What's yours is ours."

The e in Vermont was in the shape of a hammer and sickle a la the Soviet Union.

I damn near peed my pants. Not only did it have that, it had a McCain-Palin sticker on it. It's only the second one I've seen here, both before and after the election. Maybe I'm not the only Republican in Vermont after all.

Quite Possibly Not The Only Republican in Vermont

dudesworthy said...

Erin: I'm guessing its just good old fashioned sweat-shop-onomics at work.

Nonetheless that is an excellent question which I deem to be worthy of investigative journalisms...