A woman is interacting with something that looks like my printer in a manner that does not appear fun, fast or easy. She's making a card that says "I miss you!" and has two puppies on it.
I advance the channel to CNN. Rudolph Guiliani (who, based on the ethnicity of his last name, is clearly linked to Benito Mussolini as well as Adolph Hitler since both of their first names end in -dolph) is beneath the dazzling lights of the Republican National Convention, pumping his fists in the air as he repeats "Drill, baby, drill" along with the crowd. I watch for a moment, wondering how his teeth are adhered to his head.
Since there is absolutely nothing to be gained from this footage or any news story associated with it, I opt to return to the affable woman in the cardigan. Fluffing a pillow, I bear witness to the revolutionary breakthrough in paper shaping that puts scrapbooking without limits at my fingertips.
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During her research for this post, your humble authoress stumbled upon McCain's second and third runners-up for the Republican Vice Presidential candidate: