Friday, January 18, 2008

Open Letter to Mr. DiCosimo

Dear Mr. DiCosimo,

The Administration is concerned about the Ape. He was last seen defecating in the east. It has come to the attention of the Administration that you have also been commiserating with the Nun who prays in the west. The Administration is aware of your dealings with the nun who prays in the south. These dealings, however, are unimportant to the Administration.

You should know, Mr. DiCosimo, that the Administration is in possession of the note concerning your mother that you gave to the Nun who prays in the west. Said note was gravely received by the Administration, Mr. DiCosimo.

The ruby you hold in your palm is a lie.

The Administration does not, however, advise you to swallow it. Instead, Mr. Dicosimo, the Administration suggests you give the ruby to the Ape who defecates in the east. His subsequent antics will amuse you. Do not give the ruby to the Nun who prays in the west.

With solemnity,

The Administration

6 comments:

Erin O'Brien said...

This is what happens when my brain leaks.

Daniel Poehlman said...

The cake is a lie.

Now, I've got to go play video games. Thanks a bunch, O'Brien.

Anonymous said...

WHAT IS THE WORD

Samuel Beckett

for Joe Chaikin
folly -
folly for to -
for to -
what is the word -
folly from this -
all this -
folly from all this -
given -
folly given all this -
seeing -
folly seeing all this -
this -
what is the word -
this this -
this this here -
all this this here -
folly given all this -
seeing -
folly seeing all this this here -
for to -
what is the word -
see -
glimpse -
seem to glimpse -
need to seem to glimpse -
folly for to need to seem to glimpse -
what -
what is the word -
and where -
folly for to need to seem to glimpse what where -
where -
what is the word -
there -
over there -
away over there -
afar -
afar away over there -
afaint -
afaint afar away over there what -
what -
what is the word -
seeing all this -
all this this -
all this this here -
folly for to see what -
glimpse -
seem to glimpse -
need to seem to glimpse -
afaint afar away over there what -
folly for to need to seem to glimpse afaint afar away over there what -
what -
what is the word -


what is the word

Anonymous said...

Oh no! Erin's brain is leaking! Quick...somebody, get help!!!

Amy said...

Hey EOB--this is a poem. Yes it is. Love it.

Also, pitch-perfect on the Rainy Day column on rejection...

Jarvis Rockhall said...

Urgh...

I don't get it...

I'm guessing that the Ape defectating in the East is Prez Bush Jr. on his trip around the middle-east, but the Nun? Is that Hilary? Hilary doesn't seem very Nun-like to me. In my opinion she isn't even Nun-esque...