So I'm at this really crowded holiday party and I'm walking from one room to another at exactly the same time this guy is going the opposite way through the doorway and I misjudge the pass (or he did, I'm not sure) and whoosh! my boob totally sideswipes his ribcage and there we are the two of us with this contact that is normally reserved for people who have a significantly more intimate relationship than we do and it's too obvious to ignore and he's not saying anything, so I say "pardon me" in a sorry-about-giving-you-that-major-boob -rub-on-your-chest-and-isn't-it-too-bad-that-the-
and-playing-boobie-rub-on-purpose sort of tone because I didn't want him thinking that I thought he wasn't attractive and young and sexy and worthy of a substantial boob swipe despite the fact that he came in with a very beautiful woman on his arm (I was alone).
He didn't say anything back that I could hear and then he was shuffled into the crowd so quickly that I would have had to hunt him down and basically make a scene in order to further discuss the inadvertent boob lob, which I did not want to do so I went and got some more wine and talked to someone about how eating salmon just five times a month can add eleven days to your life (I'm not sure about those exact numbers, but you get the drift).
Then I went home. Happy New Year.