Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Flagrant solicitation

For those who don't already know, writers are a notoriously needy lot.

Which (of course) brings me to me. So great is my need for constant validation that I have been known to sit here before my glowing screen at an hour when everyone I know is sleeping peacefully and clicking the "get mail" button again and again and again. And, although this blog is a constant and idiotic distraction, you people have no idea how snoopy-dance happy I get when you comment and let me know that someone out there is receiving my transmission.

Fact: the only thing lower than my beleaguered self-esteem is W's approval ratings. Hence, I am putting forth one self-centered reminder and a flat-out solicitation for compliments:

(and now for an irritating note*)

(In my regular life, my writing [I do a great deal of local political reporting] and editorial efforts are public--just like this blog--and I have been advised by readers from every walk that I am a hack** and that my subject content is unsuitable and that I would be better off abandoning my silly efforts at this keyboard and spending more time looking after my husband. So as you pour over the following requests, know that I can also take the criticisms and flat out insults*** with a brave smile on my face.)

Solicitation: I invite all of you to hop over here and tell the people what you think of this blog. (No, I did not rate myself.) For those with a BlogExplosion account, go on over here and leave your rants about the Owner's Manual.

Reminder: anyone wanting to review my book has until Dec. 20 to persuade me that they are The One Who Should Receive A Free Signed Copy along with a delightful surprise or two (I have been collecting said surprises and, believe me, they are delighful).

Humor me people. Dear sweet Jesus, humor me.

* Thank you, faithful readers, for tolerating my parenthetical notes as well as these equally annoying and poorly mapped footnotes.

**I also have a few people that tell me they like my writing and political reporting, but the few that scathe are always the most indelible.

*** A smattering of the real life insults Erin O'Brien, girl writer, has fielded: "Too bad you can't report as well as you can walk." Comment yelled at me by a gentleman in passenger seat of 89 Cadillac Seville as he and the driver and other two passengers waited for a red light. I was on one of my endless walks. Judging by the coolers and golf clubs peaking from the bungy-corded trunk, they were on their way to a golf outing. I stopped, smiled and said, "Thank you for your comment," before continuing down the sidewalk.

"I really don't like the cover of your book one bit. It's just awful." Comment from sniffing browser as I sat with a stack of said books in front of me at a book signing event. "Covers are very subjective," was my vapid response, in which I made no reference to the cookie crumb clinging to her lip. She was not, incidentally, the one person to whom I sold a book that day. (What did that miserable broad want me to do? Take out a box of crayons and draft another cover on the spot?)

(This insult is only peripherally related to writing) From a local official upon whom I occasionally report, "My word, Erin, you look just terrific. You really do. Just terrific. And I don't even like you."


MsAmber said...

You ARE a good writer. And most impressively, you don't insult our intelligence.
You rarely misspell words.
Your punctuation is beautiful.
And you have an uncanny knack for staying on the subject.
I, on the other hand, wander aimlessly through my writing, usually ending up a decade or so after the time I started writing about.
Trying to stay focused....
Oh, yeah. You ARE a good writer. And most impressively, you don't insult our intelligence.
Wait...Didn't I say that already?
Oh geez. I left the Iron on.

garrett said...

Speaking of misspelled words, I "poured" something over the requests above and my computer shorted out!


Carol said...

i find that the best things in life are the simplest. . . the things that make us laugh are among the most important of them. You make me laugh. Thank you.

bon said...

The haters, flamer, troll etc.... don't listen to 'em! I love your writing tho I usually lurk because MY spelling is pathetic and the comment section has no spell check. Keep it coming, the good the inappropriate and the hah-larry-us!

Shelli said...

I think the ones who comment on your reporting must just disagree with you, because it can't be because they don't like your writing. If it is, I feel sorry for them because they just don't have good taste. You write wonderfully.

I have done the same: clicking on "get mail" several times in a row at times when it is obvious that noone would be sending me mail. Insecure bunch we are. You need not be!

FLAMINGO1 said...

I find it interesting that you do a lot of local political writing but you RARELY make any political statements on your blog or in comments out there in blog-land.

What's up with that?

Erin O'Brien said...

Believe me, Flamingo, if I were to start blogging about the small town politics I write about in my local paper, I'd hear you snoring up here in frosty Cleveland.

The only important political view to share with you is this: I think George W. Bush is the antichrist.

Christopher55 said...

I believe George W. is a close relative of Alfred E. Neuman from Mad Magazine. Look at him. The resemblance is definite. I think this explains a lot.

PDD said...

I would be very interested in reading your political reporting, Erin. I doubt you will hear me snoring from frosty Cleveland.

I think you write well. You are funny, smart and also very sexy. That "naked" picture of you seriously turned me on. You are a fox!

I don't know if you've noticed, but I can be pretty brutal with honesty. I have created many enemies both in real life and in blogosphere with my honesty, but I think I've already told you that before. You are a good writer. And anyone one of those buffoons who have made stupid remarks regarding your writing or you, are either:

A) Locked in a vacuum.
B) Locked in a church.
c) Anthropomorphic.
D) In desperate need for a lobotomy from the '2X4 that could'
E) All of the above.

#1 Dancer said...

Erin... Please, take your handheld mirror and repeat after me...

"I cute."
"I'm funny."

Feel better? I do.

(BTW, you rock. I'm addicted to you now.)

nicole said...

And you know you're MY blog-writing hero! I think that's about all you need to hear from ME! ;)

Eve said...

I know this post is six months old, but I am slowly working my way through your life (well, at least since October 2006) until I catch up to your present after which, I can now safely say, I will be adding you to my hallowed RSS reader!


Only the most serious quality blogs make my RSS reader, so you ought to be damned pleased with yourself!

I wouldn't normally comment on such an old post, but hell, flagrant solicitation should have its own reward. So, (and on a serious note finally), love your work. A totally enjoyable read so far.