Thursday, July 18, 2013

Standing your ground

Mom and Dad were at a party and I was with a baby sitter. I was six or seven.

Sometime during Love, American Style or Room 222, a slew of rowdy kids started swarming around the street and house, yelling and raising hell. It was scary. The baby sitter called Mom and Dad. Dad pulled in the drive a few minutes later, slightly lubricated with Canadian Club.

He pulled a double-sided axe from the wall of the garage and walked out into the melee, the axe at his side.

"All of you get the hell out of here!" he hollered, walking around the property. "Now! I mean right the hell now!"

They did.

Dad walked back in the garage, replaced the axe and came inside. "Had no intention of using it other than broadside on someone's ass if they got cute."

He fixed a drink, got in the car and went back to the party. The rest of the night passed uneventfully.

*  *  *


Anonymous said...

PSA: Nine out of bartenders recommend the Club. Canadian Club. It will make your car completely undriveable.


Anonymous said...

We have a Louisville Slugger in the living room closet for just such an emergency.

And a bottle of Jameson on the liquor shelf for afterward.

Tony Rugare said...

Standing your ground that makes sense.

Erin O'Brien said...

Aw Tony, I don't know if it makes sense or not, but it's a great story and a nice contrast to the blood-thirsty shoot-first-ask-questions-later voices that are so load and enabled today.

Bill said...

Creepy ass crackers usually just yell, "GET OFF MY LAWN!!".

Anonymous said...

Ahh, the days when you could drive with a good skinfull in, and when parents had the manners to ring if coming home early to allow the sitter a chance to dress herself.

Anonymous said...

Ten. Nine out of ten. I hate typos.Nine 9out of ten bartenders recommend the Club.

Anonymous said...

he-he-he-...I surrender.

Goodnight and have a pleasant tomorrow.

John Venlet said...

Erin, that "double sided axe" is a Michigan axe, just so you know.