Thursday, December 15, 2011

Early Christmas present to myself that should have been made in America

So it's Black Friday and I have absolutely no intention of going anywhere that sells Too Much Crap and I'm curled on the couch with my laptop poking around Al Gore's Interwebs when an email from World Market appears in my inbox. The eclectic retailer is offering me their fabulous Chocolate Faux Fur Throw for the unbelievably low price of $29.99--half off the original price of $59.99--for one day only. I looked down at the ratty throw swaddled around my miserable self.

Click. Click. Click.


I never want to set this blankie down. I alternately want to clutch it next to my cheek whilst dragging it around the house like a four year old, then remove all of my clothing and burrow beneath it with my splendid king (or just by myself) and engage in carnal activity. (Yes, I realize that is a disturbing juxtaposition, but it allowed me to use the word juxtaposition and I don't give up a windfall like that easily.)

Every. Woman. In. America. wants one of these throws.

Hence, you can imagine my disappointment when I discovered the throw was "Made in China." Why oh why is it so? After all, every American woman wants one. Don't believe me? See above--IT SAYS SO RIGHT THERE. Every American woman should have one. And yes, I see you out there trying, but you're going to have to do better than 400 clams (although you get points for the oversizing). We're talking EVERY American woman.

I suspect this post may inspire some purchases and don't get me wrong, I do not begrudge World Market or their Chinese manufacturer their due sales. After all, this is a terrific product at a terrific price (worth every nickel of the full $60 retail price). But before any of you boppers out there go click click click, know that the fur is on just one side of the throw. The other side is a plush brown fabric, which is also cuddly, but not as yummy as the fur side. To my would-be American manufacturer however: please do oversize and make both sides fur. Yes, I'll pay a little more.

Aha! I see you're getting closer and closer ... 

* * *

27 comments:

Contrary Guy said...

Looks like fun. American-made would have to be real beaver, and I'll leave that double entendre for the next commenter to clean up after...

Larry said...

Beaver is best....fur as I can see !

Anonymous said...

I'm guessing Chocolate Faux Fur comes from an animal related to Gary Larsons "Tofudebeast."

RJ

glittermom said...

Good luck finding anything not made in China..

Ms Amanda said...

Did a victory run through the house waving tiny American flags I'd found in my junk drawer & chanting, "USA! USA! USA!" When I was done I discovered Made In China printed on them...

Erin O'Brien said...

Must. Take. Bait.

I loves me some Anchor Hocking glass. And my Fiestaware? Erin heart Fiestaware!

But buy me a Liberty Puzzle and you've won me lock, stock and barrel.

All made in America. HELL YEAH!

Anonymous said...

"Good luck finding anything not made in China."-glittermom

Isn't it funny that Wal Mart is a communist conspiracy. Wish someone would ask that question at the rightie debate.

RJ

Erin O'Brien said...

Try you an Annin flag or maybe one from Harbortown.

Erin O'Brien said...

Have a $100 gift card to Bed Bath & Beyond. I went over there and walked around. EVERYTHING I picked up was "made in China."

**sigh**

So dumb.

Jack Cluth said...

Hmm...faux beaver. MUST. REFRAIN. FROM. MAKING. OBVIOUS. BUT. TIRED. JOKE. ;-)

Dan said...

Just need to know, Erin...

How hard does my imagination need to work on figuring out what you have on (or not) under that fur throw?

How does a gentleman ask?

DogsDontPurr said...

Not sure which is more adorable: you or the throw?

DogsDontPurr said...

Ok..hold on: this is going to be a long comment.

So, my boss works for a company that has a factory in China. He says that gradually it is actually becoming too expensive there, so companies are gradually shifting to Viet Nam and smaller South East Asian countries.

As an example of the increased cost, the owner of the factory knew that his Western/American reps were unhappy with the low quality of the Chinese accommodations, so he actually built a luxury hotel...just for them!

The previous motel that they had been staying at had prostitutes for hire that would walk the halls all night long, knocking on doors offering their services. They actually worked for the hotel. (Supposedly, this is common.)

Also, in the rooms, there were few amenities, but there was always two bottles of lube (his and hers) and condoms. You would, of course be charged for these if used...like the mini bar.

So my boss thought this was so hilarious that he packed them to bring home, and show his wife.

When he checked out, the manager pulled him and his translator discreetly aside. "Sir, there is going to be a charge on your bill for the "amenities," but we see that you have not hired any of our girls...so we just want to make sure there is no mistake."

Hahahaha! True story.

Erin O'Brien said...

JEEZ. Hope the pricing wasn't as (ahem) INFLATED on the Chinese lube et al. as it was on the mini bar items at the Shangri-La Hotel!

glittermom said...

Pfaltzgraff was made in america to, in Pa...now thats made in China...Is Fiestaware far behind?

Anonymous said...

I don't want to own that faux fur...I want to BE that faux fur...THAT ONE...
Ah, I can dream...sorry, goat...
MR

Paul Holbrook said...

You are my Christmas shopping Secret Weapon. Even though a double sided one would be great, Christmas is coming and you've just taken care of two people on my list.

I hope they don't see this before Christmas. (It seems unlikely.)

Paul Holbrook said...

Note that it's selling for $42 today (plus $9 shipping; amazon has spoiled me.)

Craig Hughes said...

I think I'd pay the made in America price if it came with pictures of attractive Chinese women burrowing under it in suggestive carnal poses.

Just aayin...

Mrs. C said...

For those unaware and who give a damn on the subject, ABC World News with Diane Sawyer has been doing a Made in America series all year long, and have reminded us of all the stuff that is, yes, still made right here in the good ol' US of A at decent wages and of high quality. The bit on NAILS (as in b"bandoleers" of 'em for use is nail guns) was pretty stunning, and it, like each of the other segments, has driven new customers and increased manufacture and jobs to the company, further stabilizing our economy. Check it out.

And, yes, I'd pay the $114 for the here-made throw--in fact, I'm an American woman, and I.WANT.ONE. So, I'm off to get myself a cuddle from furry-Claus. See ya!

Erin O'Brien said...

I am not keeping up with all of you very well, but I not telling what's under the blankie in the pic.

$114 is completely reasonable for a 60" by 72" double sided made in the USA faux fur throw and I hope you'll give us a full report, Mrs. C, when it arrives.

twinkly sparkles said...

I do not want one of those things, Erin. Perhaps I am the only Amerian woman, but I doubt it.

Silks, I need silks.

Does it wash well?

I can still find #2 pencils that are made in America.

I think Pyrex is no longer made in America. Good to know Anchor Hocking is.

It's taken me a lot of days to catch up around here. I am glad I finally got to.

Scat said...

O'Brien are you naked under there?
Well except your white cotton panties of course.

Mrs. C said...

It's on its way, Erin, and FREE SHIPPING makes me even happier. Soft and warm are my very favoite things in these Northeast winters, and I'm gonna nestle under it--naked, of course--with a glass of cognac in hand as soon as it arrives.

twinkly sparkles, I hugely appreciate silk, too--and satin, and even dense-weave Egyptian cotton--but I only really want those against my skin in the warm-to-hot parts of the year; in winter, nothing beats thick and furry.

Erin O'Brien said...

YAY!

Mrs. C said...

Here's the latest on that American-made version of your throw...

"Thank you for your order! The makers of the Ranch Mink Throw have informed us that the Ranch Mink Throw has been discontinued and they are now sold out. We apologize for this inconvenience. Please let me know if there is a different throw that you would like instead or if we should cancel your order."

There is no other throw I want for Christmas. All I can say now, through my sad, sad face, is that I'm glad it wasn't my ONLY gift to myself this holiday season or I'd be devastated...

Anonymous said...

Erin-
It just occurred to me that the most important part of that photograph WAS made in America...

MR