Wednesday, October 26, 2011

It was a beautiful and unique way to get to know someone



I could not stop watching this captivating footage featuring two positively darling newlyweds: Doug Hutchison (51) and Courtney Stodden (17). You will remember Hutchison's disturbing role as sadistic prison guard Percy Wetmore in The Green Mile.

A few notes:

--2:57 "There is a joke: sixteen will get you twenty ... " I was so mystified by the weirdness of Hutchison's mouth movements that I paid no attention to his response.

--3:42 "I was a virgin when I married him." How inspirational to learn that Courtney protected her chastity all those years so that it could be tenderly gifted to her virile groom on their holy wedding night.

--4:46 Did she just eat some gummi bears or is that a fellatio preview? Dunno.

--5:00 "Courtney's plastic surgeon was God." Clearly, the Lord's breath inflates every part of this charming new union.

Good luck to the happy couple. They were married in May.

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19 comments:

Zen Davis said...

I think they should say she is a "singer" and "actress" and the commentator should hold up their hands and gesture the quotes. She's gross and he's creepy. Best of luck to them. ;)

Zen Davis said...

PS- I think his hair piece should be illegal.

Bill said...

It seems weird but I guess it's not that unusual. More interesting when it's a 45 y/o woman teacher and a 15 y/o boy student. I was surprised at the age of consent in some countries. age of consent

g, said...

I love that this post is tagged 'BBQ SUNDAE'.

Contrary Guy said...

I wish 'em all the best, but can't see it lasting more than a few years, for all sorts of reasons. Far from the strangest thing on the Intertubes lately.

swine said...

You bastid! I can't believe you had ME watch this clip. Only you OB can do that. First I gotta say: who is this dude? The Green Mile? Seriously? That awesome, piece of shit, typical "Magic Negro" crap was nominated for an Oscar? But also this made me introduce my coffee to my keyboard via my nostrils: "she signed up for his acting workshop." Bwaaaaaahahahaha.

Nice hairpiece, by the by.

Erin O'Brien said...

I apologize. I truly do. It's like some sort of hypnotism.

Unusual? Maybe not, but the creep factor on this one--with the porno-teen and has-been actor coupled with the god stuff and parental consent? That is world class creepage.

This is the creep jackpot.

Bill said...

Woody Allen and Soon-Yi come to mind. Except Woody actually LOOKS creepy.

Bill said...

Oh, but, God wasn't involved.

Chris said...

She's a scary creature, and he defines creepy. My take is that they deserve each other. I feel kind of sorry for those little dogs, though - I'm pretty sure they didn't consent to any of this.

Anonymous said...

Not. Enough. Soap.
MR

Erin O'Brien said...

The wedding dress at 3:25 is just lovely.

alphadog said...

Oh ferchrissake.

Mike Lawless said...

I never meet deeply Christian woman like that....

glittergirl said...

she looks like a middle-aged stripper. if god is her plastic surgeon, he might need his license revoked.

DogsDontPurr said...

Can you imagine what she'll look like when she's 40? Oy.

Kirk said...

If you're an old movie fan, Karl Malden and Carroll Baker comes to mind.

Erin O'Brien said...

Wasn't familiar with the movie, Kirk but the Wiki plot summary gave me the major creeps:

In the Mississippi Delta, failing, bigoted, middle-aged cotton gin-owner Archie Lee Meighan (Karl Malden) has been married to pretty, empty-headed 19-year old virgin Baby Doll Meighan (Carroll Baker) for two years. Archie impatiently waits for Baby Doll's 20th birthday just a few days away when, by prior agreement with Baby Doll's dying father, the marriage can finally be consummated. In the meantime, Baby Doll still sleeps in a crib, wearing childish shorty-nightgowns and sucking her thumb, while Archie spies on her through a hole in a wall of their decrepit antebellum mansion, "Tiger Tail".

Erin O'Brien said...

I just watched the Baby Doll trailer.

Holy shit.