Friday, December 24, 2010

The perfect gift

Dear you,

This writing thing may be the lifeblood of my soul, but behind the curtain, the process rips me apart. I start things and never finish them. I start things, finish them and throw them out. When I finish things and submit them to the towering Publication Gods, they are usually rejected again and again and again. Sorry, they say as I blink and sigh and fall down.

That’s what it’s like out there in the big bad world. But in here with you? In here with you, it’s different.

I love you.

When my chosen craft swirls insanely around me and I can barely hang on, you’re my safe harbor. Throughout all the pass-overs and rejection and pain, you lick my wounds with your praise and arguments and observations. And on the days when I don’t think I can manage one more word, you’re here, magically unlocking that door. I swing it open and the world shimmers with possibility once again.

What would I do without you?

You are my muse, my raison d'ĂȘtre and the object of my desire. Without you, my words would be paltry raindrops dotting the ocean. Don't you doubt this for one minute: I never take you for granted.

There is no end to what I want to give you. I search endlessly for the loose corners. When I find one, I gently tug it in hopes of pulling away a layer and getting that much closer to the human condition. When it falls away like a shed skin, I am at once bathed in the joy of truth and devastated by the daunting task of reporting it to you.

I weep at your feet and beg you to forgive my shortcomings. I laugh and I cry and I breathe. I write. And when you read my work, that is the most precious gift I know. Thank you.

Merry merry. Happy happy.




Anonymous said...

He not busy being born is busy dying.
Bob Dylan

merry merry

happy happy


Tony Rugare said...

Buon natale to you and your family.

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas to you and your family.

James Old Guy

Bri said...

Merry Christmas, Erin. Thanks for sharing your many gifts with us. Well, me; the rest can fend for themselves.

Me said...

I go through these little existential blogging crises from time to time. Why am I doing this, I find myself wondering.

But you got it, right here. This is why. Because when, in our day to day lives, we shout out into the darkness, in blogland we might get a reply.

A Happy Merry, etc.

Bill said...

Thank you Erin. I take that personally. And, you are a year round gift.

Kalei's Best Friend said...

Well said Erin!... U definitely know how to thread the words together...Keep doin' what u do...

Vince said...

Happy Christmas girl of O'Brien. Nollaig maith agat agus air a clinna feinn.

DogsDontPurr said...

Happy Xmas, Erin! And thank YOU. Your blog posts are like little gifts I look forward to each day. Keep on doin' what you do.

Cheers to a fabulous New Year!

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

All I know is that I have a duck to make tomorrow. Probably tea smoked duck.

Oh, and that Erin is, of course, awesome.

Best to the Goat and 'Lil Goat this Christmas season, Erin. May John Boehner imitate Santa Claus and come sliding down your home's chimney this evening, bringing good cheer and tanning salon appointments for all .... ;-)


Anonymous said...

Boehner would weep if he read this.

Off topic (Hate to defile such
a heart felt post but...)TRAG you see this?

"The World Association of Chefs has named Master Sergeant Mark Morgan of the U.S. Army Rangers as one of the three best pastry chefs in the world, as reported in the local newspaper of Fort Monroe, Virginia, where Morgan is based. He earned the distinction at the recent Culinary World Cup in Luxembourg, where he represented the U.S. culinary team and won two gold medals."

...and Happy Holidays.


Erin O'Brien said...

Hola gang!

I'm glad you brought that up, RJ because I forgot to send him the link ...

standing on my head said...

the gift that keeps on giving-thanks, erin.

Anonymous said...

i took that personally, and it made my day. i used to drink out of your garden hose when i was in that corner of the park. still mad ?

dean said...

I love you too, O'Brien.

Merry Christmas.

VideoDude said...

Merry Christmas Erin. And to all who post on this board.

We thank you, for it is you who give us a place to voice, share and argue our different ideas.

Thank you.


philbilly said...


Anonymous said...

Erin, I found you by accident and have made you a daily habit. You are bookmarked on four computers in this house. I am anonymous, but maybe it's time to go public soon, because you feel like a long-time good friend and you should know me as well as I now know you. I have a pretty interesting life. I just turned 60 two weeks ago and I now have "grandma neck". For my birthday I decided a trip to Brazil was in order, where I have a five year old grandson waiting for me. This is due to a daughter who eloped with a fabulous Brazilian who looks like a cross between Antonio Banderas and a gorilla. So on New Year's eve, I will be on a beach in Brazil, waiting for the first sunrise of the new year, snuggled up with my grandson and a bunch of young people yelling "happy nude rear" and mooning each other, and I'll raise a glass to you, my friend. Thanks for being my friend.

Mrs. C said...

I love you back, Erin--you're inspiring. Merry happy to you and yours.

Bill said...

Pretty cool comment, 60 year old anonymous! Yes, you should identify yourself. I hope the grandson got the Banderas genes but gorillas are ok too.

Amy L. Hanna said...

You're welcome.
Happy New Year.

Kirk Jusko said...

Merry belated Christmas. Just came across the post now as I've been away from the computer

Daniel said...

I like it.