Friday, June 12, 2009

Conserving in America

I'm driving with my kid in my 2003 Mini Cooper, which I purchased when gas was about $1.30 a gallon.

"There's another Mini," she says. "How come there's so many Minis around here?"

"Because this part of town is more liberal than our part of town," I say. We are in Cleveland Heights, close to Case Western Reserve University, about 20 miles away from our White Wonder bread suburb on the city's South side.

"Aren't you a liberal?"

"Yeah."

"What's that have to do with cars?" she says.

"A lot of liberals drive small cars in order to conserve gas," I say. The Mini gets anywhere from 30 to 40 MPG depending on any number of things. "You don't find many liberals driving big cars unless they have a pretty good reason."

"You mean big cars like Dummers?" she says.

"Exactly," I say. "Big cars like Dummers. A lot of your conservatives like your Dummers."

"Don't Dummers use a lot of gas?"

"Yeah," I say.

"Then why would a conservative drive one?" she says. "Shouldn't a conservative conserve? I mean, you conserve everything, so you're a conservative, right?"

"It's the terminology. I'm a liberal, but I conserve. A lot of your conservatives don't like to conserve. That's the irony of the thing, kid."

She considers this for a minute and says, "They ought to call those conservatives the wastetives."

* * *


Wastetive: An American "conservative" who fails to actually conserve anything. The wastetive twists the noble concept of freedom into a selfish and childish lifelong tantrum that swirls around the wastetive's own overblown sense of entitlement and sentimental pining for an obsolete perception of the American Dream shaped wholly from conspicuous consumption.

A wastetive complains about having to drop his or her beer can into a different trash can than their Whopper wrapper and will often refuse to do so. They drive their gas-guzzling SUV to work all by themselves, clogging up the highways while feeling smugly "safe" within their giant steel box whilst their exhaust pipe pours out toxic fumes that poison our future. Many wastetives choose to delude themselves into believing that there is nothing toxic about vehicular exhaust fumes. To them, I ask this: how about you load up the Escalade with your wife, kids and dog Spoofy, park it in your three-car garage, close all the doors and fire up the ignition?

No? Gee, why not?

Oh yeah, everyone will be DEAD in about an hour. Will you believe the fumes are toxic then?

Although a wastetives will never conserve anything on their own, they whine and moan whenever someone else suggests that they pay more for their gluttonous ways via taxes or (gasp) legislation. In such a case you will see wastetives do what they do best: use more than they need. But in this case the resource will be words. No one can gas on like a wastetive who is afraid someone will ask them to conserve.

A wastetive demands that they must have everything they want! while a liberal only takes as much as they need.

Fortunately, the idiotic way of the wastetive is finally garnering proper recognition. No one much likes the wastetives except the Saudis. The wastetives fund a lot of the Saudis' operations and are even building a glittering city in the middle of the desert courtesy of the wastetives. It's called Dubai. Yes, the Saudi's really love the wastetives.

Until the wastetives learn their lesson, the rest of us will just have to tolerate them.


45 comments:

Anonymous said...

Here's ya a liberals big car:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/30/automobiles/autospecial2/30young.html?_r=1&scp=1&sq=neil young lincvolt&st=cse&oref=slogin

Long May You Run: Neil Young’s Eco-Lincoln.

RJ

paul bitzan said...

From the Oxford English Dictionary...

liberal

• adjective 1 willing to respect and accept behaviour or opinions different from one’s own. 2 (of a society, law, etc.) favourable to individual rights and freedoms.


Or not.

Anonymous said...

That's what we Conservatives are here for Erin. Liberals need something to tolerate on a daily basis or they're unfulfilled. This weekend I'm taking my gas-guzzling big ol' truck out, and I'll put it to work like my other tools. It contributes to society more than a lot of people I know.

dean said...

I dunno. Plenty of Suburbans and Expeditions with Obama stickers on them.

What it comes down to, Erin Baby, is that there are plenty of assholes on both sides.

Erin O'Brien said...

True Dean. But how many McCain stickers did you see on a Yaris or Smart car?

Zen Wizard said...

I drive a Thunderbird because I am part Plains Indian...

...only been on the side of the road ONCE, which was last night...

(S)wine said...

I'm a liberal who loves to conserve and drives a Fascist/Far-Right car ('06 Jetta) (as you do as well, Madame...Minis are BMWs, really).

I'm so confuuuuuused.

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

This one almost defies comment. The title should actually be "Why Liberals are Superior to Conservatives in everything because they care about everything."

I am a conservative. In my lifetime, I have owned/driven:

A '77 AMC Gremlin, straight six engine (and awful lime green paint - what was I thinking?)

A 1987 Ford Escort EXP, 4 cylinder

A 1989 Ford Ranger pickup, 6 cylinder

A 1991 Mitsubishi Eclipse GS Turbo (4 cylinder turbo)

A 1995 Dodge Ram Club Cab, V8

And currently, a 2003 Dodge Ram Club Cab, Hemi V8

As I see it, liberals who hold themselve as superior to conservatives because they "conserve" and drive small cars which, when touched lightly, dent, should be happy we drive such hulking behemoths. We use more gas, and hence pay more for it. As gasoline is taxed, we're actually paying more in taxes than they are. This way, Pelosi, Reid, Obama and crew can now use that tax money to fund any number of things, you know, like telling people how much they can earn, regulating the amount of sugar one puts on one's cereal in the morning, hiring an underwear "czar" (why not, they've got a czar for everything else), etc.

As for Dubai, I've actually been there. I've talked to people who live there. We are not the only ones invested in Dubai - other Arab nations (the Saudis, Iranians, Kuwaitis, etc.) are all deeply invested there, as are the Europeans. European companies, in fact are doing much of the building there, not us. One of my contacts told me even the Russian Mafia is there as well. To assert that the U.S. is singlehandedly building Dubai into what is today is simply inaccurate and ignores the reality.

As for conserving, I actually take short showers and don't keep the water running when I shave. I also don't waste food. So this conservative conserves, contrary to the popular wisdom.

BTW, Erin, your Mini contributes greenhouse gases everytime you drive it, just like my truck does. The only difference is the amount of fuel you use on a daily basis. All cars have catalytic converters to reduce pollution, but they pollute nonetheless. Until we develop a vehicle that uses no fossil based fuels, we all will continue to be guilty of contributing to polluted air. Hybrids help, but they're not pollution free, so to speak.

BTW, I think I'm going to go out and park like the Hummer you have in the picture. Just to piss off a lib.

Al
TRAG

Erin O'Brien said...

Al, I think there should be a special gas tax just for you.

Erin O'Brien said...

In fact, we can call it the Petrol Surcharge for Retired Army Guys Who Read the Blog of Erin O'Brien.

Zen Wizard said...

A point:

"The federal government has no business running a car company because they know nothing about cars."

Counterpoint:

3 insanely successful vehicle product launches made by the US Army with no product testing, no prissy designer team, and no market testing:

1) Hummer
2) Jeep
3) Harley Davidson

DogsDontPurr said...

I guiltily drive an SUV, but I have a good excuse. I use it in my business, to haul around stuff. I have an antique biz, so I'm usually packed to the gills with junk finds. I also haul things for clients in my job as a personal assistant. Then if I'm not packed to the gills with stuff, I'm usually packed to the gills with Alan's kids and their friends. Often I've got a combination of all that going. It's is a rare moment that my SUV is empty.

So, I do have an excuse. I just couldn't do all that with a smaller car.

Hopefully, by the time I'm ready to buy a new car, there will be a good selection of hybrids or alternative fuel SUVs.

This post was another of your classics. I especially love your use of the word "Dummers." Classic. Did you know that you actually can't haul much inside one of those? They look gigantic on the outside, but they are oddly kind of small on the inside.

Glass Houses said...

I think we have several problems here.

1. Some conservatives who read this are clearly missing that this blog does not attack all conservatives, just those who waste.

2. Erin, because she is NOT and asshole, does not acknowledge here that some liberals are assholes, often more so than those conservatives we're calling wastetives.

Also, it's funny that you posted this today. While driving to work, I could not change lanes because a large man in a humongous truck with monster tires would not let me over. When he finally passed me, he gave me an appraising look and a wave. I don't know if he was a liberal or a conservative, but he was definitely an asshole.

Erin O'Brien said...

I have no problem with big, it's WASTE. I hate waste, particularly conspicuous waste.

And yes, I tolerate it, but I don't think that was the sort of toleration the OED was talking about. I think they meant different views on social issues, religion, etc.

I'm a-sorry if peeps don't like it, but the days of the massive-for-the-sake-of-massive American internal combustion beast are over.

You know who I'm talking about in this post. It's not the landscaper with a truck full of lawn equipment or DDP with her antiques or the mom with a load of kids and swim floaties (although I guarantee you those people are more often than not paying serious attention the the MPG when they buy a vehicle).

I'm talking about the big-for-big's sake and who-cares-about-MPG assholes. Yeah, I tolerate them. Yeah they have a right to that vehicle. But I no likey.

I'm talking about the kind of asshole who uses the ATM and stays parked there fooling with his card and bills and reciepts while others wait behind him.

I ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS pull up and get out of the way before fooling with my wallet. Why? Because I respect the next guy's time and I don't waste that either.

Get it? Respect. I respect all the goddamn petrol on the planet and I am aware of the myriad costs this filthy fucking caustic chemical incurs. Hence, I pay careful attention to how much I use.

Erin O'Brien said...

oops. posted that after Glass Houses comment.

Alan states said...

Wastevites has a nice ring to it.

Anonymous said...

Well you will be happy to know I parked my Escalade, not because of gas but because the UAW built an expensive crappy piece of shit that squeeks. I will just have to survive driving my v-8 BMW, gas mileage is about the same but I do look cool and the damn thing doesn't squeek. Do I have to show my retired Army guy ID to pay the tax?

James Old Guy

Erin O'Brien said...

James, no ID necessary. Just belly up with the cash.

Tony Rugare said...

"Conservatives don't like to conserve",I like that. Unfortunately I know a few self proclaimed liberals who drive behemoths. I guess they are liberals because they like to be liberal with our well being.

Glass Houses said...

S'okay Erin. I got yo back.

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

"3 insanely successful vehicle product launches made by the US Army with no product testing, no prissy designer team, and no market testing:

1) Hummer
2) Jeep
3) Harley Davidson"

Zen,

You're wrong here. The Hummer was the replacement for the Jeep, and there was a lot of testing done on it - I know because the folks in the now deactivated 9th Infantry Division at Fort Lewis (they were a motorized, e.g., wheeled division) did the testing on it for the most part. You can read about the HMMWV's history here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HMMWV.

As for the Jeep, it was not designed by the government - it was designed by the Bantam company, and it too underwent a lot of testing before becoming the wheeled vehicle of choice in World War II. More here.http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeep

As for Harley Davidson, they've been around since the early 1900s from what I understand. Their bikes are tested I'm sure before being offered to the government or the general public.

Al
TRAG

P.S. I've decided to wait until I get back to liberal hell, also known as Montpelier, Vermont to take up two parking spaces. This way I can bring my camera and record libs becoming unglued. I'll make sure to put a big GOP sticker on my truck too.

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

"In fact, we can call it the Petrol Surcharge for Retired Army Guys Who Read the Blog of Erin O'Brien."

To paraphrase Erin's favorite President, George W. Bush: Bring it on. I'll pay it. Particularly as it will afford me the opportunity to piss off libs at every opportunity. Nothing quite like watching them whine and wring their hands in anxiety about any number of things. It's better than a visit to Cedar Point, Coney Island, and King's Island combined.

Al
TRAG

Al the Retired Army Guy said...

"A wastetive demands that they must have everything they want! while a liberal only takes as much as they need.

Really? Explain to me then how Hollywood liberals drive expensive, gas guzzling cars (and yes, I know there are some who don't). Liberal actors, such as Martin Sheen live in mansions. Is this as much as he needs? Give me a break. George Soros, a multimillionaire and an avowed liberal, only taking as much money as he "needs" from his businesses? I don't think so.

Al
TRAG

P.S. For the record, I want:

I co-op in Fayetteville (not going to happen - the owners voted to shut it down). Still don't have one.
A Kramer Knife (I'm on the waiting list). Still don't have one.
My custom Alembic bass to be completed (paid for, waiting to be completed - BTW, I ordered it over three and a half years ago. The company is small, and is family owned and operated. www.alembic.com). Still don't have it. It is paid for in full, BTW.
A new Dodge truck (I won't buy one even though I could because I like not having a car payment every month). Don't have one, but man, it would be nice, especially a 4X4 as I have to return to liberal hell in about three months.

Al
TRAG

Anonymous said...

You really missed the mark on this one, Erin. Good job teaching your kid prejudices.

Glass Houses said...

Al - Dude, chill out!

Once again, Erin was not attacking ALL conservatives, just those who waste. Her language in the original post makes that clear. You have made it a point here to state several times and in several different ways that you are NOT one of the people she is talking about. So why are you taking this post so personally??

Your vehement defensiveness makes it seem that you are missing the point of this post, and you are a smart guy so I know you're not.

For those of you who are focusing on the use of the words "liberal" and "conservative", the point is this: WASTE IS BAD. It ruins our planet for future generations. Plus it's rude.

I don't see any room for argument with that.

(S)wine said...

Al's "smarts" is showing off. His defensive, typical conservative spiel on this post has given me many snickers. I wonder, Al, if you realize that your piss-poor attitude, taking 2 spaces, etc. pisses off people OTHER than liberals. You know, normal mothafucking people who perhaps have a handicapped child who could've used that extra mothafucking space your shitty truck has taken just to spite, you know...LIBERALS.

Dude, re-think your philosophy and be kind to people in general. IN SPITE of that kindness being returned to you. You know, maybe do it just to fuck with them. Be nice to an asshole, see what happens. In fact, I'm gonna push for a "Be Nice To an Asshole Day." I need another day off. As a liberal, un-willing to work and live off the government, I think it would be apropos. Whatcha think Mr. Armed Forces?

Erin O'Brien said...

Actually, where I get into trouble is here:

"A wastetive demands that they must have everything they want! while a liberal only takes as much as they need."

I didn't let the post sit and return to edit it. I just published it when I finished the first draft and read it over a couple of times.

You get in trouble whenever you use generalizations. That sentence probably should have read: "A wastetive demands that they must have everything they want! I only takes as much as I need."

Oh well.

As for righties and their cars, y'all should have been there to see this.

Anonymous said...

For most people a choice of a mode of transportation is driven by two things, cost and desire. If you have the luxury of putting cost second then desire is the winner. I have sold cars in my long and checkered past. I would say in excess of eighty percent of car drivers are driven by price. Now that is just from my experience. The only time gas consumption ever comes into play is when the cost of fuel is high and even then the consumers balance the current cost of the vehicle and their paycheck. People on a car lot rarely buy the car they came into see or possible buy. Check Car-max for a price guide, a 2008 Mini with 10k on it for $23,147 or I can buy a 2008 Dodge Durango for $19.998, now the Mini gets much better gas mileage as I would expect. Highway for the Dodge is 19 epa mpg, the Mini gets 32 epa mpg. If your driven by nothing but fuel cost then the Mini is the winner. I could sell the family of four the mini with some clever calculations on gas savings over the finance period more than making up for the difference in price. I could also go the other way and tell them that in the event of a car wreck, the chances of survival in the Mini is much less that in the Durango. Now you figure out which one this family of four will buy? Now if it is a 23 year old college student the outcome will be dramatically different. People don’t buy or not buy vehicles based on the environment or wanting to cheat people out of a handicap parking space. Erin didn’t buy her mini based on gas mileage alone, she thought the little thing was cute and sporty and she would look hot in it. Attaching liberal or conservative labels to the car buying process is a waste of time. Oh and just for the record, when a man and wife come in the showroom, nine times out of ten the woman makes the final decision even if the man doesn’t realize it. It’s a cute car but doesn’t meet my needs or desires and besides hitting a deer in that thing would not be a good idea.
Damn that was long post and not at all in line, but what the hell


James Old Guy

Anonymous said...

We've been through
Some things together
With trunks of memories
Still to come
We found things to do
In stormy weather
Long may you run.

Long may you run.
Long may you run.
Although these changes
Have come
With your chrome heart shining
In the sun
Long may you run.

Well, it was
Back in Blind River in 1962
When I last saw you alive
But we missed that shift
On the long decline
Long may you run.

Long may you run.
Long may you run.
Although these changes
Have come
With your chrome heart shining
In the sun
Long may you run.

Maybe The Beach Boys
Have got you now
With those waves
Singing "Caroline No"
Rollin' down
That empty ocean road
Gettin' to the surf on time.

Long may you run.
Long may you run.
Although these changes
Have come
With your chrome heart shining
In the sun
Long may you run.


elegy for Neil Young's 1948 Buick Roadmaster hearse, September, 1976

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

"Al's "smarts" is showing off. His defensive, typical conservative spiel on this post has given me many snickers. I wonder, Al, if you realize that your piss-poor attitude, taking 2 spaces, etc. pisses off people OTHER than liberals. You know, normal mothafucking people who perhaps have a handicapped child who could've used that extra mothafucking space your shitty truck has taken just to spite, you know...LIBERALS.

Dude, re-think your philosophy and be kind to people in general. IN SPITE of that kindness being returned to you. You know, maybe do it just to fuck with them. Be nice to an asshole, see what happens. In fact, I'm gonna push for a "Be Nice To an Asshole Day." I need another day off. As a liberal, un-willing to work and live off the government, I think it would be apropos. Whatcha think Mr. Armed Forces?"

What do I think? I think you take things too seriously, especially on a blog. Do you really think I'd take up two spaces on purpose? As you don't know me and I don't you, you cannot possibly speculate on what I might do regarding parking my truck. For the record, I don't take two parking spaces. My commentary to that effect was very tongue in cheek. Again, you're taking things way, way too seriously. Besides, there is no way to take two spaces in Montpelier - the enlightened "progressives" up there have everything metered, and have hired parking Nazis to make sure everyone pays (gotta have that revenue for their latest stupid idea, like, say, not building parking garages and spending it instead on God only knows what). Even if I wanted to it would be practically impossible. Thus the tongue in cheek nature of my post.

I am kind to people, believe it or not. I just find it somewhat amusing that some will take comments on a blog literally and blow them out of proportion. You say I have a "piss poor attitude" and that I need to "re-think my philosophy." Again, you only know of me in this forum, and not in person. None of the nuances of face to face communication are included (videos notwithstanding) in this forum, so no one has a comprehensive understanding of whether I was being sarcastic or serious (in this case, it was more sarcastic). You have no idea what my attitude is on any number of issues, other than I've written about here, nor do I know about your stances. Frankly, I don't care what they are - everyone has their own opinion on things, and that's as it should be. So before you go judging my attitude as "piss poor" and advising me to "re-think my philosophy," understand that you actually have not basis on which to make that observation due to the fact that you have no clue who I am and what I'm about in the end.

BTW, I enjoyed your "typical liberal spiel."

Finally, as for being a liberal who is unwilling to work, I'll just say that there is a reason the Republicans exist - we work hard so you don't have to. I actually have a t-shirt to that effect. People in Montpelier just love that one.

Thanks for calling Mr. Armed Forces. I'm proud of that, though I believe those Americans who've earned the Congressional Medal of Honor deserve that moniker much more than I, as do all of our servicemen and women who've given the ultimate sacrifice in the defense of our country.

Al
TRAG

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

"Many wastetives choose to delude themselves into believing that there is nothing toxic about vehicular exhaust fumes. To them, I ask this: how about you load up the Escalade with your wife, kids and dog Spoofy, park it in your three-car garage, close all the doors and fire up the ignition?

No? Gee, why not?

Oh yeah, everyone will be DEAD in about an hour. Will you believe the fumes are toxic then?"

If you did the same thing with your Mini Cooper, you'd be equally dead. In about an hour, give or take a few minutes.

Al
TRAG

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

Written by Erin:

"Exactly," I say. "Big cars like Dummers. A lot of your conservatives like your Dummers."

Written by Glass Houses:

"Al - Dude, chill out!

Once again, Erin was not attacking ALL conservatives, just those who waste. Her language in the original post makes that clear. You have made it a point here to state several times and in several different ways that you are NOT one of the people she is talking about. So why are you taking this post so personally??"

I stand corrected. Not all conservatives do, but according to Erin "a lot like Hummers." I'm still waiting for the hard statistics to back that up. Until then the implication is clear - conservatives like Hummers, and are inherently wasteful as a result. As would be any liberal who drives a Hummer. And there are some, trust me - I've been to Vermont.

I'm not taking anything personally, BTW. And I don't drive a "Dummer." In fact, I don't like the civilian version, but I have nothing but praise for the military one. Those things will go anywhere, trust me.

Al
TRAG

Erin O'Brien said...

I swear you people make me want a drink at nine in the morning.

Thanks for the interesting comment James and for explaining to me exactly why I bought my car.

Al, as for the reactions you get, you're the one who loves to talk about pissing off libs. So when you actually piss one off and he tells you off, man-up. After all, you asked for it.

Big Mark 243 said...

I had never read a comment thread on anyone's journal before. What people say about someone's observations is to me, their business. If the writer chooses to repsond, then so be it.

This reminds me of a message board, with all the give and take on here. I did think I might have something to add, but my piddling $.02 is best kept in my pocket for another day.

I don't even know what I had wanted to say after reading all of this. Erin, you must freakin' rock! Stirring up all this, you must write and reach people's souls!

Either that, or they don't have anything better to do. Eh, six of one ...

Erin O'Brien said...

Thanks Mark. I love comment threads like this one. Isn't this really what the Internet is about? Methinks yes!

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

Erin,

I have "manned up" as you say. And yes, it's true - I enjoy "poking the snake" as it were regarding liberals. It doesn't bother me in the least when they react. Most of the time I'm quite amused by it - emotional outbursts followed up by assertions devoid of hard facts and statistics always give me a chuckle.

Al
TRAG

P.S. Happy Birthday, U.S. Army.

philbilly said...

When people tell me they're vegan, I look at their shoes. If they are made of leather, I ask them if they just threw away the rest of the cow. If they are hand-woven fair trade jute sneakers, then rock on, bean eater.

When people flagellate themselves and each other over what each one drives, I think of Pogo, " we have met the enemy, and he is us."

Here's how I look at it. Every time the thing I'm driving that day starts up, 'specially last March, I give praise to the Gods of Entropy and Electro-magnetism for blessing me again with unlimited mobility, a rubber-winged Icarus.

Then I enter traffic resolved to stay alive and be as little of an asshole as possible. Here I am utterly astonished, without fail, at the dangerous, inconsiderate douchebaggery of some American Motorists. Seriously, who do you fucks think you are? The worst offenders are the ultra high-end wealthy and the ghetto rats, the Bookends of Entitlement.

Be grateful, and not dead, for the staggering weath and convenience we enjoy every day. Recession? Bite my crank.

We are moving into an era of efficiency becoming the driving market force. We've built a mighy empire on consumption, and now all we have to do is convert unavoidable waste into alternate input, and eliminate unneccesary waste. No political party can do this, it is in fact antithetical to political ideology to be efficient. It will take people who make things allowing consumers to make informed choices in a field of viable products.

Can't wait to test drive a Hydrogen Cadillac. With my jute driving shoes.

Hal said...

Thing is, chix luv guys who drive big wastey cars.

philbilly said...

I will concede that some chix dig Bulgemobiles, but I personally have been thoroughly and pleasantly molested by numerous beauties who dug my fuel efficient boxers.

The gymnast always comes to mind.

Al The Retired Army Guy said...

Actually, Hal, chicks dig guys who can cook ... or so I've been told ... ;-)

Al
TRAG

(S)wine said...

Al, i don't take you or your comments seriously, hence my response to you. i usually don't write or formulate opposing opinions in that manner, nor do i deliver them like that. so no worries there mate. in fact, it'd be safe for you to realise that most people don't take you seriously. which is good; in life one ought to play the buffoon--his (her) existence is much lighter and devoid of burden, whether psychological or otherwise. so no hard feelings...you are not taken seriously, rest assured and sleep well.

John Ettorre said...

Never knew you had a Mini. You're even more of a hipster than I thought.

Al The Retired Guy said...

Thanks, Swine. I don't take you seriously either. And I encourage you to continue playing the role of buffoon. As I see it, you're perfect for it.

Al
TRAG

(S)wine said...

cool and the gang. the only difference is i never asked you to. i am ecstatic to play the role of the jester; traditionally in monarchy freedom of speech was not recognized as a right, however the court jester, because anything he said was by definition a "jest" and "the uttering of a fool" could speak frankly on controversial issues in a way in which anyone else would have been severely punished for.

i'll gladly take that role.

Primordial Dork said...

I just read all 44 of these comments and my head hurts. I think I need a tall glass of Brown Clamato.

You all need to play nice, or I will bust out my collection of dangerously acquired camera phone commuting photos of single occupant SUV's with ridonkulous vanity plates driving dangerously.