Monday, October 02, 2006

Internus Maximus

This is Max Mitchell. Max was the 2006 summer intern at Scriptype Publishing where I have edited The BroadView Journal for about five years. I am leaving the post, which I will surely miss, but the time has come to broaden my freelance career.

Now then, onto Max. I really like Max. Read pages 34 and 35 on this pdf version of the September 2006 Issue of The BroadView Journal and you will too.

Here is an excerpt from the excellent essay referenced above:

"All the editors continue to confuse me by sitting right next to me and then talking to themselves under their breath. Depending on the editor they usually either burst into song, or give me updates on their progress with phrases like, 'Now we’re cooking with gas!'"

Surely, Max was not talking about me in this excerpt. Because had Max said something about me, it would have been, "Erin O'Brien was a sterling example of a brilliant journalist and she is really cool despite the way she constantly asked about my ties and described my shirts as being 'George Bush blue.'" Plus, I don't sing loud enough for anyone to hear me.

And another excerpt:

"The second thing I learned inadvertently from Anne Coulter. She came to Syracuse University for a speech, which I attended with my likewise politically purple friends. When the columnist was asked about what she would do to help either the economic or social decline of small towns, she bluntly answered that she knew nothing about small towns and that she couldn’t answer the question."

I reference this because it is evidence that Max has what it takes to become a fine writer. He brilliantly, subtlely and without intrusion, exposes Coulter for what she is while telling his story. It is an eloquent aside, adeptly handled.

I do believe we will be hearing from Max Mitchell. Whether or not he learned anything from me this summer, I couldn't say. I surely learned a thing or two from him.

Important Max Facts

Date of Birth: December 27, 1985 (The very month and year when I could have been Miss December had I only tried harder).

Breakfast: A bagel with melted cheddar and hot sauce (which is, ironically, one of my favorite breakfast selections. I enjoyed one this very morning.)

Books designated as notable by Max: Dune, Bonfire of the Vanities.

Movies designated as notable by Max: Repo Man, Strangers with Candy.

Television shows designated as notable by Max: Rescue Me, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

Maximum Toothpaste: Colgate.

Maximum Music: James Brown's Greatest Hits, Highway 61 Revisited by Bob Dylan.

Max Right now: In Spain as a University of Syracuse student overseas.

Max Major: Journalism.

Newspapers: New York Times, USA Today.

Maximum Hair Care Product: "Pantene Pro V is the only one that really works."


Denny Shane said...

Max sounds like a good friend!

Anonymous said...

ha, my kid uses Pantene too, maybe it is a youth thing

Anonymous said...

i am not's just early and I am half a wake ..going to go to Pilates first time in 1 1/2 years....yipes

Bostick said...

Look at his eyes. Dude looks high as hell.

Dean said...

If that's what Pantene Pro-V does to your hair, I gots to get me some.

Bostick: O'Brien looks kinda baked too.

~d said...

I love Max.
Max rocks.
Max is young.

therefore ~d loves young dudes who rock.
My logic for the day.
Anyone want to question why I flunked psychology?

WAIT another example: I love dudes with big bushy hair. My sister has big bushe hair. Therefore my sister is a dude.

(I gotta stop!) *don't they make medicine for this?!?

~d heart bubble baths.
~d heart Erin.
Erin heart bubble baths.
Therefore Erin heart ~d.

(I quit)

Libby Spencer said...

Oh he's so cute. Now that you're done with him could you wrap him up and send him over to me? I could use an intern...

The MERKIN MAN said...

Damn. Max makes me feel like a loser.

Lisa W. said...

Max is pretty damn cool.

Anonymous said...

I like you Erin, a lot

the recently added, Timothy Gager

PDD said...

I like Max very much. I will hit on him if he ever visits your web chat parties. I can't believe he's born in 1985! I remember that year. I was 8. I remember being 8 and writing the number 8 and how fantastical I thought that number was. Two boobs, vertical. Max, my husband is kissing me right now and rubbing my 8's. (seriously). I would ask you to join, but... my husband just said no. Okay, I'm going to have sex now.

jamwall said...

i have no idea what you just wrote, i was staring at the afro...mesmirized....

Le Chitelier said...

Max sounds really cool although he is far too young for my dead-corpse-ass.

Jozee said...

My oldest daughter was born in 1986.

So I will just say-

I like your style,

best wishes Max!

Winters said...

A splendid head of hair indeed.

Jesus Toast said...

YOu and Congressman Foley need to leave your young interns alone!

Roxi said...

i tried to read this.. I really did but honey I couldnt get past the hair..

The hair was fucking mezmerizing..

It was like the sweet succulant pull of a sirens song..

I was entranced..

Brookelina said...

I can't stop staring at his hair.

Lipp said...

Side Show Bob.

shaina said...

he's so, like, the PERFECT age for me. i wanna run my fingers through that hair...
plus, he can write.